Family Friend and Mom's Birthday

A friend of the family has been visiting my mother and brother in Guelph. He's the one responsible for introducing my father to my mother, so he's indirectly responsible for me and my brother being born. He was in the hospital while I was being born, and he sheltered my family during a difficult time of need. Despite having such significance during the early years of my life, he moved out of province when I was young, and it has been over twenty years since I've seen him.

He came to visit a number of friends and family that he also hasn't seen since moving, and he brought one of his daughters with him for the first portion of his trip. He was planning to stay in a hotel but my mother offered to let them stay at her place.

It's a little bit interesting, because when my aunt and cousin have visited Guelph in recent years, they have stayed at my mother's place. My mom's place is becoming more frequently used as an overnight residence, even though it's only a two bedroom apartment and two people already live in it.

Coincidentally, it was also my mother's birthday and also Mother's Day (very convenient to have your mother born so near Mother's Day). Even more conveniently, I usually work weekends, but I had a cancellation, so I was able to visit Guelph on my mother's birthday.

The family friend's daughter had already left by the time I arrived, but I got to meet with the family friend for the first time in over twenty years.

Some of my grandparents visited for my mother's birthday and they took us out for lunch and dinner. Mom got to choose where we would go and she chose a few places we'd never been before. We went to the Greek Garden for lunch, where I had the souvlaki plate, and to the Bread Bar for dinner where me and my brother split a Bee Sting Pizza (honey and chili flavoured).

For her birthday, I got my mom a bean grinder. I was a little skeptical, because my mom doesn't drink much coffee, but it's what she requested. Apparently she's into cold brew now, and it's useful for chopping nuts as well. I got one with a five year warranty and settings for how fine or coarse you want things chopped, and I also got her a couple different coffee bean flavours. My brother got her a bunch of presents.

I have all my grades back for last semester. I passed everything by a safe margin.

Group Interview

So I attended the group interview for the Summer Program Assistant Onsite Director position last Monday. That's a level above the Summer Program Leader position, which I've held the three other years that I have worked for the Summer Program. The only difference is that in addition to the standard Summer Program Leader tasks, the Assistant On Site Director is in charge of the Peer Leader program. The Peer Leader program is an opportunity for people diagnosed with a developmental disability to hold a leadership position in the Summer Program, which may include hosting activities, assisting with the implementation of activities, engaging participants, and set up. The Assistant On Site Director would be in charge of hosting interviews for Peer Leaders, programming their training, evaluating their goals, and overseeing their progress throughout the program.

Last time I mentioned that I had to do a group interview, which I hadn't needed to do since my first year of Summer Program. I said they had me "jumping through hoops" which I hadn't needed to do other years when I was a return staff. I thought that was weird, and suspicious.

Well, I was waiting for the interview. I was the first there, so I got to see the three other people sign in asking about the Assistant On Site Director position. I was like "You're all here for Assistant On Site Director? None of you are here for Summer Program Leader?"

And then it clicked. First year, I applied for the Assistant On Site Director position instead of the Summer Program Leader, because I didn't know the difference between the two positions, and I felt like "Assistant" was a weaker title than "Leader". So I interviewed for Assistant On Site Director and wound up with the Summer Program Leader position. In years following, I was requested to interview as a returning staff and didn't ask about the specific position. So they only interviewed me for my previous position as Summer Program Leader. This year I specifically applied for the Assistant On Site Director position, and so for the first time since my first year, I did the expanded interview.

When going in, I told myself that I wouldn't talk up  my credentials. Part of me wanted to address everyone applying with, "Yeah, I've got four contracts with Extend-a-Family, did my student placement with them at their day program for two years consecutively, done three years with their Summer Program, and I teach their Safe Management courses." But I thought that would be unprofessional, and would be perceived as unprofessional.

My interview was at 5:00, and the office shuts down at 4:30. I showed up at around 4:30 and as other applicants arrived, they got to see every office worker stop and make small talk with me, implicating my extensive history with the organization.

My fellow applicants gave me some suspicious  glances and I was like "I've been with Extend-a-Family for a bit"

It also created an interesting dynamic between me and the current Summer Program Manager and On-Site Director, as they clearly didn't know how much they were supposed to acknowledge our previous history.

Our icebreaker question was "If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?" I said "I would be purple because it's the combination of red, the hottest colour, and blue, the coldest colour, and therefor, it is the ultimate colour".

All three interviewers broke out in heavy laughter. There's a difference between familiar laughter and stranger laughter. Familiar laughter is wild, while stranger laughter is controlled. The strangers cast looks at me.

Our first task was, as a group to create a program lasting for three hours, which needed a high-energy activity, a low-energy activity, a craft, and a closing activity. We had a set of resources, and we were told that, within the group we were facilitating for, we had two people with manual wheelchairs, one person with an electric wheelchair, and someone who can only hold attention for ten minutes. We developed an ice breaker activity, an obstacle course, a sitting-parachute activity, and a build-a-country course. Then we all had to present one section each with the interviewers acting as participants.

Weird dynamic because we're all competing against each other, but we're competing to prove how good we work on a team. So we're competing to be the best at being inclusive and making our competitors look good.

Then we split into pairs and were asked to do roleplay exercises. I had to pretend to be a staff member who was texting incessantly due to a family emergency while being quite defensive about it while my partner played the role of a staff member who needed to confront me about it. Then I had to be a staff member that had to confront my partner, playing a participant, who refused to leave the bus while an angry bus driver shouts at me. Then I had to play a participant that ran away from the gym while my partner probed me as to why. Then I had to be a worker that had to develop a strategy with a fellow staff member who was uncomfortable to lead a group alone or confront an escalating situation when a program participant had just thrown a rock at us and run into the woods while we were taking a walk through the woods and had no communication devices.

Then we had our one-on-one interviews. They had given the questions ahead of time, so it wasn't too intensive. Soon as I was alone with the interviewer he was like "Now we can finally stop pretending not to know each other. I really appreciate how you didn't try to intimidate the other applicants. They have some good experience but you have the most".

Then I did a written bit, developing a strategy for a program participant that was having difficulty engaging herself. Then the interview was over. They said they will get back to us late next week.

Chocolate Favoris

In early April I made a post about a chocolate coated ice cream store that was opening in Guelph, and how I was excited about it because over five years ago, me and a group of people went to one of them in Quebec City. Being the only person in the group to not speak French, I responded "non" to a question regarding my order and walked away with a plain ice cream cone when the place was known for their chocolate, not their ice cream.

This was in Canada World Youth, and in this program we had an anger management exercise where we were supposed to consider if we would still be angry in five hours, days, weeks, months, or years, and if we wouldn't be, is it really worth getting angry over to begin with? I would use this as a bit and explain how after five years, I was still angry that I didn't get my chocolate, and so yes, it was worth getting angry about.

I recently facilitated a Safe Management course, and after the first session, me and my co-facilitator went out for ice cream.

We got into the store and I ordered a large, crunchy hazelnut with dark chocolate. The person I was ordering from asked me what my name was, so I said "Gryphon", to which he responded, "Oh sorry, I should have asked you what your name is" which was confusing but inconsequential.

I was in a crew of six, composed of me, my co-facilitator, her husband and child, and one of her friends. They all got their orders before I did. I started to think "Something's going to happen, life won't let me have this." Then I see my cone in preparation. Man, the large was a LOT larger than I was expecting! There were like, five scoops on it! The dude looked super concentrated as he balanced the cone and prepared to dip it in the chocolate. This place just opened, so it's not like these people are seasoned ice cream preppers.

He dunks it in and I wonder what happens if the ice cream falls out. Would he have to replace the entire vat of chocolate? But it comes out, the mountain of chocolate coated ice cream wobbles back and forth before being cemented in place as the chocolate hardens.

He drizzles a little bit of another blend of chocolate on top, then sprinkles shaved hazelnut, and starts placing chocolate covered hazelnut on top. All the way through the cone looks unstable and I want to tell him to stop playing with it and just give me the cone. But I wait and the end result was glorious. He was actually getting praised by his fellow ice cream people for his craftsmanship.

Even though it had hardened, I still felt cautious about handling it, just because the ice cream stack was so humongous and the cone itself was so tiny. It looked like something out of a cartoon.

My co-facilitator was surprised at how well I managed to keep the ice cream out of my beard. Chocolate coated ice cream is one of the most difficult things to eat with a beard, by the way. The first time I tried it, way back in Katimavik, I wound up looking like I had straight up mashed my face into a bowl of ice cream. And that was with a regular sized cone without any additional adornments. Taking down this behemoth of a cone was like the ultimate test of all my practice eating messy things with a beard.

Somehow I managed to eat the whole thing. Pretty pricey. $10 for a freaking cone of ice cream. If I ever go back (and I probably will, my mother and brother want to go), the medium is more than enough, but I'm kind of glad I did the large on that trip. I'd waited over five years for it, after all.

It was brought up, what would have happened if I had said "Oui" that first time in Quebec City. There is no way I would have been able to navigate the menu. So I was able to retroactively determine that, while disappointing, I actually made the right call all those years ago. Talk about closure.

On the second Safe Management session, my co-facilitator asked me to tell the ice cream story. She'd taken a picture of me with the ice cream cone (I'll try to get a copy of it) and it kept being referenced throughout the session.

The previous day I had preached about self care and the importance of a healthy diet in regard to mental wellness. Then afterwards, I stuffed my face with ice cream.

I got an interview for the Summer Program. They're making me do the group interview though, which I haven't had to do since my first time. Making me jump through the hoops.

UMAB Recert

Recently got recertified with UMAB (Understanding and Managing Aggressive Behaviour), which is the training we got at my old group home job. I mentioned before that several long standing employees as well as my old supervisor were fired. Now an old friend of mine is running the house, and she has reached out to me to be more active as a relief staff.

The training was at the Cambridge location, which was much more convenient than the one in London Ontario, which required me to stay in Guelph, and then spend five hours on a Go bus and then five hours back. Regular city transit still had me riding for about an hour and fifteen minutes to get to the Cambridge location, although I got a ride back.

I was surprised that I knew four people at the training. They kept talking about stuff that had happened during the time I worked there, even though I'd worked there for six months and had been gone for eight. I felt like I hadn't missed a beat.

Because my last shift was over six months ago, that means I have to redo my file. That means, in addition to the training, I have to get a medical examination done, I have to get a criminal record check, and I have to get some youth-specific criminal record check. I might even have to get someone to read the manual to me with all the regulations. It's a big drag. Last time I went, the medical examination was $100, the criminal record check was $30, and the youth-specific one was maybe $15. So if I'm going back, I'd better make more than $145.

I also reapplied for my old Summer Program job with Extend-a-Family. I skipped last year because I was occupied with the group home job, but the two years before that I managed to find a position despite not being a student when it is normally a student job. If I get a position this year, it will be the first time I've been a student while working for this student job since I began four years ago.

Taxes

The past few days have been crazy. Mid-April and we're getting blizzards that are leaving huge snow drifts. It's a winter wonderland over here. Everybody's got their snow blowers out, snow plows are patrolling the city. It's the second time this has happened in April, although the first round only lasted about a day, whereas this has been a few days. One day to the next, you don't know what season it's going to be.

Last time, I was supporting someone and it felt like we were literally fighting a blizzard. This time, I've had two people cancel on me because it's potentially dangerous to be outside.

When I did my Safe Management Recertification, my co-facilitator let me know that I'm the agency's "biggest paperwork headache. Apparently, of the hundreds of direct support people, I'm the only one who works both directly with them, and independently but using their system. Had no idea. I just chose to work with people using the agency if the agency found them, and I worked independently if I was the one who found them. Don't know why it's not more common.

I lost my Wal Mart Rewards Mastercard somewhat recently. It had $1000 worth of credit on it. Canceled the card that got lost and had it replaced. Now it's worth $2500. Don't know why they decided to give me another $1500.

Did my taxes recently. Last year, I came the closest I ever have to the poverty line. Just have to make $10,000 more and I'm officially lower-middle class! Only had to work three jobs, one of them being full time, to make that accomplishment. I'm a student again though, so yeah right.

I learned in Social Psychology that wealth only impacts happiness until you reach a certain income level. However, I'd still need to make three times as much as I did last year to reach that income level, so I think it's fair for me to keep seeking wealth.

Although to be fair I didn't work at the grouphome for a full year.

I made enough money last year that my tax return went from increasing to decreasing. I was using a $15 service from Turbotax. After putting in my first two T4 statements, I had a $3000 return, which is higher than I've ever received. Thought it would really burst up when I put my grouphome T4 through, which was my largest statement by far. Instead, it shrunk to $500.

For some reason, your return is much smaller if you're a student than otherwise. In years past, my return has gone from like, $1500 to $500 after stating I was a student. So this year, having only a $500 return, I was worried I'd be $1000 in the pit. But instead, after I stated I was a student, it raised to $800, Can't understand it.

Tax day is an emotional day, watching a number bounce up and down drastically with you having only a shaky understanding as to why. Feels like gambling.

Creeper in the Window

Finished my final essay for Russian Studies. Now I just gotta wait for grades to come back.

My brother was in some dance recital. He joined a Dance Theatre group and they did a performance based on a three song mashup from the movie Hairspray.

Sounds like it went pretty well. There were a bunch of other groups as well, including Irish dancing, Latin, Tap, Seductive, Contemporary, Jazz, Hiphop, and Sword Dancing. There may have been others as well, but that's what I remember him mentioning.

Last time I was in Guelph, my mother told me the neighbour was staring at me through the window.

They live in a basement apartment, so the window is closer to the ceiling, and to look into the apartment a person would have to get low.

I turn to look at the window, and indeed there is a man squatting and staring directly at me, eyes bugging out of his head, but it isn't our neighbour.

As soon as he sees me see him he runs away. I'm grateful for his absence, but that reaction shows that he's not just socially oblivious or something, and he realizes what a faux pas it is to stare at someone through their window.

I'm ranting to my mom about how creepy that was when he comes back. He motions at me to meet him by the front door. He's got a dead serious expression on his face and his gesture is sharp and weirdly authoritative. I'm a large man, and I'm unused to strangers being so demanding and authoritative on a first encounter. He walks out of view before waiting for my response.

I say, "He wants me to meet him?" Mom's like, "Well, you're the big guy."

Oh screw that. Letting people you don't know, who stare in your window tell you what to do gets you killed. I crack the window open and shout "HEY BUDDY!"

Guy comes back and asks about one of the upstairs neighbours. I tell him, "He lives upstairs and our apartment doesn't connect. Can't help ya." and close the window.

I shouldn't have even engaged him that much, to be honest. Should've just closed the blinds.

Mom tells me "Before you noticed him, he walked by the window with a shovel."

Now I don't fully trust my mother's eye witness testimony because she initially mistook the guy for our neighbour, but the image of him with a shovel certainly does ramp up the creep factor. Makes me imagine him waiting outside the front door where he gestured me to meet him, ready to conk me with a shovel.

Maximum level creep right there. I won't soon forget the image of him, with his deadpan expression and hyper-focused, wide eyes, staring at me, squatting outside our window, with a shovel just out of view.

In all probability he didn't have any ill intentions. Or if he did, they were perhaps intended for the neighbour. But man. Don't stare into strangers' windows please.

Ice Cream and Chocolate

I finished my Social Psychology test, now I just have to wait on my final grade. If I pass the test, I pass the course, and if I don't... there's not a huge margin for error.

Got 93% on my Russian Studies presentation. Just have to write an essay now, and I'm done the school year.

Way back in Canada World Youth, during my rotation in Quebec, one time me and my counterpart, as well as another pair of counterparts and our Project Leader, went out to Quebec City. We went to some icecream place. I wasn't fluent, and when the server asked me a question I didn't understand about a topping I said "non" to eliminate further conversation and minimize the language barrier.

On the other side, everyone in my team is eating chocolate-coated icecream. I note this, and my Project Leader says, "Of course, we're at the House of Chocolate, Chocolate Favoris"

I'm like, "So I came to the House of Chocolate, the server asked me what what kind of chocolate I wanted, and I said NON?!"

During our initial cultural sensitivity training, we had a practice where we were asked to step back from a difficult situation and ask, "Will I be angry in five hours? Five weeks? Five months? Five years? So is it really worth being angry about?"

Telling people about that practice, I offer the example of Chocolate Favoris, and I say "It has been five hours, weeks, months, and years, and I am still mad I didn't get that chocolate covered ice cream!"

When I was carpooling with my coworker to my Train the Trainer recertification, at one point, my coworker screams. I ask what that's about and she's like, "This ice cream parlor is opening up! It's like Dairy Queen on steroids! They have like a million options for chocolate dips!"

I say "That's a bit of an extreme reaction for ice cream. It reminds me of this story where I..."

She says "I finally won't have to go to Quebec City for it!"

"WHAT?! What is the name of this place?!"

"Chocolate Favoris"

I screamed.

They are opening a location in Guelph of all places, and now me and my coworker are going to go there on opening day.

This will be so cathartic.