Brown Christmas

Title for this post is kind of forced. In 2019 the title was "Blue Christmas" because a bunch of sad stuff had just happened, and in 2020 it was "Grey Christmas" because Ontario was using a colour-based system for its COVID measures, and we were just entering Grey, which meant lockdown. So this one is just for the weather. We almost had a white Christmas, but had a flash thaw overnight that left everything brown on Christmas morning.

Realistically it would be another Grey Christmas. You probably know already, but there's a new COVID variant called Omicron which is thought likely be much more transmissible than any of the others, although it's looking like it likely is a little less deadly. Italics used to emphasize we don't know things concretely yet.

Apparently there are now 12 variants. I literally haven't heard of any of them since Delta. I guess if a strain doesn't prove to break a record of transmissibility, it doesn't get the press it used to. I remember hearing about Omicron and thinking that sounded like it didn't come right after Delta in the Greek Alphabet. I looked it up, and yeah, it's the 15th. More than halfway through, I wonder what our naming scheme will be once we use up all the letters.

Although they skipped a few because it was bad branding, like "Nu", since it would have people calling it the "new variant" which is confusing, and "Xi" since it would sound like it was named after President Xi of China. It would be funny to adopt this naming scheme to replace using country names, especially since it started off with people calling it the "China Virus" or "Wuhan Flu" only to use the new system to call a strain after the president of China.

It certainly feels more ominous than last year, since in 2020 we knew a lockdown was on the horizon, but the government buckled to societal pressure and postponed it to Boxing Day. This year they called it before Christmas, which feels like they really had no option.

Technically, it's not an official lockdown. We don't have phases, colours, or steps which were the systems put in place to tell us where we stood. But safety measures are increasing and society is reacting. My job's gone remote again.

I was surprised, to be honest. Not long ago I said that if another pandemic happened right now, or a much more deadly variant, that I didn't think society would be as proactive as it was during the first wave. The hope would be that we would know how to handle it because of all the knowledge and experience we've acquired over the past couple of years, but in reality, I thought that everyone had become so burnt out and mistrustful of the government, that an attempt to lock us down again would be met with record breaking noncompliance. 

I guess that's why they haven't installed a system or officially called it a lockdown, but instead just rapidly integrated new safety measures. Society isn't happy about it, but we're not broken either.

We were going to have a Christmas gathering at our place. My mother, brother, aunt and cousin were going to visit, which would have been within the current limit of 10 people allowed per indoor gathering, but my family is more on the cautious side and everybody cancelled.

I won't lie, I received an invitation to join Lee-Anne's family and I accepted. I felt bad because everyone in my immediate family chose to not take that risk, but if I stayed home I would be the only one spending Christmas alone, so either way I'd be isolated in my circumstance.

MESH Self-Assessment 2021

Back in 2019 I made a post about an Emotional Intelligence assessment I did for work, called MESHdiversity. I was given a series of scenarios with examples of four potential reactions to each. I then ranked each reaction from how I would most likely react to least likely for every situation. The data I gave was then analyzed and my emotional intelligence was ranked on a scale of 1 to 10 in 36 different categories.

They then got me to find a minimum of three people and have them do the survey based on how they thought I would react. Their data was compiled and combined, and I was given the 36 rankings based on how other people perceive me. This way, you can see if your self-perception matches the perceptions of others.

So we did it again this year. I answered the questions for myself and for four other people, and got four people to rank me as well. Two of them were the same people that did my surveys in 2019, and two of them were different.

I don't have my 2021 assessment from others yet, but I do have my self-assessment. What's cool about this is that, since I've still got my results from 2019, I can compare how my self-perception has changed over the past two years. I'll include the results where changes occurred.

So my overall self-esteem has increased 4%, with my combined results over the 36 categories having gone up by this much.

My Emotional Awareness went from a 10 to a 9. Decreased one point. This is the ability to understand the origins of our emotions, which helps us to mediate our feelings and in turn, manage our behaviour. Was one of my best qualities, which has changed but it's still an area of strength.

My Growth Focus went from a 6 to a 5. Decreased one point. This is the ability to seek help or support from others. Apparently I used to be bad for this and now I'm even worse. I should maybe note here that MESH doesn't let you rank lower than a 5, so I could actually be even worse.

My Receptivity went from a 9 to a 6. Decreased 3 points. This is the ability to take constructive feedback and implement it for positive change. This went all the way from a strength to a weakness.

My Motivation Style went from an 8 to a 10. Increased two points. This is the ambition to do well without the motivator of extrinsic reward, like praise from others, bonuses or benefits. I'm more genuine and self-motivated now, taking more pride in my work based on its quality and how it makes me feel.

My Ambition went from an 8 to a 9. Increased one point. This is the desire to improve oneself based on internal development, such as keeping track of personal progress (kind of like what I'm doing here) and external markers, such as increases in job status.

My Composure went from 10 to 8. Decreased two points. This is the ability to be calm and composed in high-pressure situations that may be stressful and dangerous. This is still a strength of mine, but less so.

My Agency went from 7 to 9. Increased two points. This is the ability to learn from mistakes, to turn failures into opportunities for growth, to deal with and master challenging demands. This went from something I was average at, to an area of strength.

My Determination went from 8 to 9. Increased on point.  This is the ability to come up with goals and to overcome obstacles to achieve them. This was an area of strength that has become stronger.

My Versatility went from 10 to 9. Decreased one point. This is openness to change, the ability to flex and adapt under shifting circumstances. This is still an area of strength, but less so now.

My Optimism went from 5 to 7. Increased two points. This is the ability to manage uncertainty and find positivity in the face of challenging circumstances. This went from one of my weakest areas to something I'm average at.

My Intuition went from 8 to 9. Increased one point. This is the ability to combine our thoughts and emotions, tapping into our unconscious resources to come to conclusions. This was an area of strength that has increased a bit.

My Empathic Accuracy went from 8 to 5. Decreased three points. This is the ability to pick up on how other people are feeling based on facial expressions, verbal and non-verbal signals. Interesting to see that it went from a strength to one of my weakest areas.

My Compassion went from 7 to 8. Increased one point. This is the ability to show kindness to others, both in professional and personal life, to be invested in others. I was average in this area and increased it a bit to become and area of strength.

My Validation went from 10 to 9. Decreased one point. This is the ability to accept others and consider their needs without assuming a similarity to myself. This was one of my strongest qualities. It's still strong, but a little less so.

My Curiosity went from 9 to 10. Increased one point. This is the desire to learn and show genuine interest in others. It was an area of strength for me in the past and has become one of my best qualities since then.

My Collaboration went from 7 to 10. Increased three points. This is the ability to keep a positive frame of mind when confronted with conflict, to avoid polarization and to avoid win/lose thinking in favour of win/win. This went from something I was average at to one of my best qualities.

My Follow Through went from 8 to 9. Increased one point. This is the ability to "walk your talk", to balance your "can-do" and your "will-do" attitudes. The ability to do what you say you will, which earns the trust of others.  I was strong in this area and got a bit better.

My Civility went from 9 to 8. Decreased one point. This is the ability to disagree without being disagreeable. To speak in a way that encourages dialogue. This is still a strength of mine, but a little less so now.

My Openness went from 8 to 10. Increased two points. This is the ability to be respectful, accepting, and appreciative of peoples difference, to not allow implicit biases to control my perspectives of others. I was strong in this area and it has since become one of my best qualities.

My Appreciation went from 9 to 6. Decreased three points. This is the ability to recognize the good work of others. This has gone from an area of strength to a weakness.

The other 16 categories had the same rank as 2019's assessment.

This year I ranked myself highest in: Motivation Style, Curiosity, Collaboration, Openness, and Influence, all of which got a 10, the highest possible ranking.

Influence, which is the only area I got a perfect 10 in each year, is the ability to get people to shift their perspective to match mine.

I ranked myself lowest in: Growth Focus and Empathic Accuracy, both of which got a 5, the lowest possible ranking.

The biggest fluctuation between assessments was by three points, which happened for four categories. My Receptivity, Empathic Accuracy, and Appreciation all went down three points, while my collaboration went up three. So most of the large fluctuations were toward the negative, but the number of categories where I improved were more numerous, to the point that I made an overall improvement.

UAPs

One of the weirdest developments over the past few years has been the normalization of talk on UFOs. In 2019, videos were leaked of US Navy personnel observing the flight patterns of unidentified flying objects. They moved at impossible speeds against strong wind with no discernible source of propulsion, and in one case submerged into water. In 2020, a statement was released that neither confirmed or denied the legitimacy of the leaked footage but acknowledged their "veracity". In 2021 they confirmed that these videos were taken by the Navy.

In 2020 the Unidentified Aerial Phenomenon Task Force (UAPTF) was established, and in 2021 a report was released on information collected on these and similar sightings. In addition to the odd qualities seen in the videos I've mentioned, these objects have been known to occasionally emit radio signals, hover in place, demonstrate maneuverability that can't be replicated, break the sound barrier without creating a sonic boom, and stalk US aircraft. The final verdict was that it cannot be confirmed whether or not the origins of any of these objects are extraterrestrial.

I'll be honest. I'm a believer. I believe in big-headed stocky grey-bodied people in flying saucers who have not only visited Earth, but visit regularly. I don't require that you believe what I do, it makes no difference to me. But it's funny how different people can interpret stuff like this report. When I was visiting Guelph one time I brought it up, and Mom (who is not a believer) said "Oh, I saw that. I almost wanted to call and tell you, but I didn't want to sound like I was bragging" I was like "What do you mean?", she said "They can't confirm it's aliens" and I was like "They also can't confirm it's not!"

Of course most UFO sightings are the product of hoaxes, misperceptions, mental instability, tall tales and lucid dreaming. Believers often point to the infinite possibilities that the universe provides, which skeptics sometimes concede to, while maintaining their position that even if there are aliens out there, they likely haven't visited us, and they're probably in the form of algae or moss or something.

To the credit of skeptics, this idea that because the universe is potentially infinite, it provides infinite possibilities leading to inevitable contact, is kind of flawed. Even if there are millions of planets with intelligent life forms, there is no guarantee that any planet has enough resources to make it far enough to meet its closest neighbours. After all, it's easy to forget that even something as unnatural-seeming as a computer chip or a Kraft single fundamentally come from resources found on our planet Earth. If we don't have the specific resources, or have it in the quantity we need, this assumption of unending advancement is kind of weird.

And the vastness of space is such an incredible hurdle. It's impossible to comprehend exactly how much space is in space. You can fit every planet in our solar system between the Earth and the moon! And they're comparably right next to each other!

But because of historical and cross-cultural consistency, as well as some of these new developments, I believe it is more likely than not that some entity has tapped into a situation in which they are able to, and do visit us.

The UAPTF is not the first instance of government funded research on this topic. The Advanced Aerospace Threat Identification Program ran in secret between 2007 and 2012, and similar operations have run under the names Project Sign, Project Grudge, and Project Blue Book.

Until recently, governments have preferred to keep their research into such matters private, so the public development of the UAPTF and 2021 report are notable. The slow rollout of information since 2019 with sparing commentary and the rebranding from Unidentified Flying Object (UFO), to the less stigmatized Unidentified Aerial Phenomenon (UAP), feels like an attempt to normalize these sightings. Why are we being encouraged to talk about it now, especially when it's been discouraged for so long?

Former Israeli Space Security Chief Haim Eshed has said straight-up that extraterrestrials exist, that there's a Galactic Federation, and that there is a base on Mars with both human and alien representatives. This came out in 2020 (weird year). He said that deals have been made between extraterrestrials and the US Government, and that information has been limited so as to avoid mass hysteria. He said that they're waiting for us to be ready to be aware of them, and that he's become more outspoken recently because people have become more open. That's a bit much even for me... Honestly, the only reason that this got traction is because of the guy's resume. 

I'll share the one story I have of some people I know who claim to have had an encounter. They were out at a cottage, on a lake. One guy was trying out a flashlight, and as he shone it back and forth, he impulsively decided to point it up. Above them was a flying saucer. Hovering, making no sound, showing no lights. They all saw it. And then, noiselessly, it just moved up, up, up, and out of their field of vision. No idea if this story is true, but the way he emphasized "You'd think there'd be lights, everyone talks about lights" seemed like one of those weird little details that stick with you when you get surprised by something.

Honestly, the alien thing isn't really that intimidating to me. If they're here, it seems like they've been around for awhile and have left us relatively undisturbed. Egyptian hieroglyphs depict advanced aircraft that they wouldn't have had access to, and the Nazca Lines in Peru seemed to be made for viewing from the sky. Both of those sources depict some weird looking humanoids, too.

The idea of the US having developed technology to this level in secret, so that lower government branches aren't even aware, is its own brand of terrifying. I heard an official state he was concerned that the US might have been "leapfrogged" in technology by another country, although its' been stated that the technology observed in these sightings is beyond what is known to exist on this planet. I don't necessarily trust humans to be more responsible with that technology than the hypothetical aliens.

If the government is just straight-up lying... That's also terrifying.

If it's natural phenomenon, it runs contrary to what we understand about physics. All the non-alien theories are still fascinating. 

I guess the most mundane theories surround camera glitches and incidental optical illusions. Still, we're talking technology and analysts from some of the best this planet has to offer, it's hard to write it all off to tech problems and human error.

If I had to guess, I'd say that we're kind of like a nature preserve. We're being monitored by an advanced species, likely simply for the purpose of study. Maybe we're considered an evolving or developing species and they're not supposed to interact with us because it could result in us being domesticated. Something went wrong in Egypt and they learned from it, maybe. Or perhaps it's for a larger ecological reason to do with solar systems that we can't understand yet. Stories of people being abducted, probed, and replanted back on Earth sound kind of like when we tag an animal and release it back into the wild for observation. 

Of course, there's always the possibility that their purposes are simply beyond our comprehension, being more evolved. After all, us humans are unable to convey information even to animals that are exceptionally compatible with us, such as cats and dogs, or even to some of the cleverest, such as chimps, parrots, and dolphins (honourable mention to octopi and elephants). Why do we assume that we are equipped to process information from any potential species, even if we learn to interact with them?

Maybe they come from the Lost City of Atlantis, or maybe they're a kind of mer-people. After all, these crafts have demonstrated an ability to maneuver through water as well as air. Maybe they are aliens, and they have a base beneath the ocean. After all, we've only discovered like, 5% of it. Good place to hide out. Saves a trip to Mars.

Maybe these are time travelers, and the big-headed stocky grey guys are just evolved humans. The unathletic bodies could be from a continued sedentary lifestyle through advances in technology, and the big heads could be from brain growth through evolution.

Maybe the squat grey bodies are robotic. After all, we can do so much remotely with our own technology, would an advanced species feel the need to send traditional explorers? Maybe they're organic but artificial. Maybe they're made to look like humans so that they'll seem approachable to us, but they missed the mark like when we try to create convincing robotic animals but they can't quite convince the species they're built to mimic. That would mean the original creators of the bodies would likely look much different from us. Maybe it's all the product of an autonomous AI.

At any rate, I can't explain it but it's all very weird, and I feel like it's going to get weirder sooner rather than later.