Great Grammie Passes

Earlier today, on December 27th, 2014, my great grandmother passed away at 100 years of age. As far as I've heard, she passed peacefully in her sleep. She woke earlier in the day, requested a meal of her granddaughter, whom she was living with, ate, and decided to take a nap. She fell asleep holding her granddaughter's hand, spoke in her sleep to her father, and passed. She is the last of the third generation before me.

I hear it's not uncommon for someone to pass after Christmas. They find the strength to live long enough to attend that ceremony that our society puts in such high regard.

The last time I saw her was between when I finished Ways2Work and started Katimavik, at a family reunion. I don't remember the exact date, but that would put me between nineteen and twenty years of age, so six-five years ago. Since then, I'd spoken to her over the phone.

Christmas

Christmas was good. It was the first year I think we've ever had where none of us in Guelph were flat broke, so it came out at a more even exchange than usual. Among other things, I got a new chromatic harmonica. I haven't had one since Air Canada lost my luggage in Katimavik. A little messing around and I can still play "Frere Jacques" and "When the Saints go Marching In" and my blues riff was recognizable.

We had a pretty dreary green Christmas. Grass is growing outside.

I met up with an old friend from high school. I think I had my first "old man" talk. He mentioned something about being around college kids, and it's like... I'm still a college kid, eh? Living in student housing and the whole bit. He pointed out that if we'd started aging when we'd graduated high school, then we'd be in grade two. And I'm one of the few in the old gang who isn't in a committed relationship. Bah.

Got all my grades back and it all turned out okay. I think I've taken an upward swing since last semester. Looks like I perform better under pressure.

Did I mention that a little while ago, my bank changed my credit card to a different type without notifying me? and that it made my new card not work? Well, they ordered me a new one and sent it to my branch in Kitchener so that I can't pick it up.

And my smart phone stopped working. I don't have any outstanding fees, and I spoke someone on the issue. She said that my service is active, I don't have any fees, and my network is fine. But my phone says "No service. Emergency call only", it won't let me text, and it won't let me search for connections.

So I have a credit card and smart phone that I can't use. Should have been content with my debit card and pay-as-you-go flip phone.

B12

Near the beginning of this Christmas vacation, I started getting dizzy spells. This has never been an issue with me before, so I did a lot of speculation. I thought it might be from the drastic shift from sleep deprivation, I thought it might be from difference in air pressure due to Guelph being a dried-up lakebed, I thought it might be from harsh weather changes etc. Then I remembered that I had cut meat mostly out of my diet for a number of months this past year. I decided I wouldn't purchase meat or prepare it at home, but that I could eat it if it was offered to me or I was ordering something. I had a bit of a better knowledge of how to balance myself nutritionally since my last attempt to go vegetarian, and I wasn't going all the way anyway.

But I remembered that from the last time I got my blood tested, I am vitamin D and B12 deficient. D is almost always low for Canadians, but B12 was unique to me, and I found out that you get B12 from meat. I loved meat at the time, so the B12 deficiency was in spite of my carnivorous behaviours. Cutting meat might have been a tipping point.

Then I heard that the B nutrients get used when dealing with anxiety, and I'm so bad for that. So I'm eating meat again and feeling healthier than I have in months. I hate eating meat though. Bah.

My worst dizzy spells were in grocery stores. I went to Food Basics today and felt nauseous when recalling the last time I'd been there. I think it was mostly from the lighting. Grocery stores are so bright, and the Food Basics near where we live is really bad for that. I remember the Food Basics near where we used to live had really classy lighting. Like, it used chandeliers. So uncharacteristic for such a low-brow grocery.

You know what I think is foolish about Food Basics? They have that policy of putting a chain up between unstaffed registers, and they have their exit doors past the register area, as if they don't trust the bar code system to stop people from stealing. Zehrs, which is a more expensive grocery, has a shared enter/exit section, and it doesn't bother with chains. If someone were to steal, I'd imagine it would be from Zehrs, so the mistrusting attitude of Food Basics seems inappropriate.

I visited 2ndChance a while back and got to catch up with my old employment counselors.

Back in Guelph

My brother got to visit my place in Kitchener last week. He even got to meet some of the people at my placement. He was really impressed by how many people in Kitchener I know.

I'm back in Guelph as of a few days ago.  It's a weird feeling, as a major appeal of being here is in how few people know me. Even though this is the place I grew up.

I'm feeling pretty out of it. I'm going to need most of this vacation just to recover from that last school crunch. I did have sort of a cool-down week where I just had to do placement and work shifts, but I really need at least a week where I just don't have to think about anything.

New Phone

Even though I have a new cell phone, I've still been using my flip because it's pay-as-you-go and my new phone is on a plan. Might as well use the minutes I paid for on my old phone. Slowly revealing my phone to people. As of now, eight people have my new number.

My new phone has a game called Piano Keys. It's a reflex game where rows of piano keys scroll down the screen and you have to tap the black ones but not the white. The keys scroll faster and faster until you lose.

So my friends would see me texting on my flip and playing on my smart phone. I'm like "My flip is for calling and texting, and my Android is for Piano Keys".

There are a few things about the flip I miss. The durability, for one. With this smart phone, the screen is always exposed, unlike the flip where it is covered in a protective shell when not in use, and since it has a touch screen, I feel like it's not just more vulnerable, but also more valuable than the flip's. Makes me nervous.The phone itself is also wafer-thin, which makes me anxious about it's durability.

Also, the battery. The difference is that I need to charge my flip once a week, and my smart phone once a day.

But the smart phone is far superior to the flip for texting. No more pressing a button six times to get one letter. No more writing half a message only to receive an annoyed text from whoever is waiting for it, forcing me to choose between saving my message and checking the one I received, or guessing at it and finishing my text there. No more having to delete texts. No more seeing messages piled haphazardly on top of one another.

And I have a camera that actually works.

I was using the pay-as-you-go enough that there really wasn't a financial reason to stick with it, especially at the sacrifice of so much functionality.

But I gotta say. Smart phones have always seemed like toys to me. Even though whenever I whipped out my flip people would say "Oh, it reminds me of the phone I used in high school!" implying the juvenile nature of a flip, I honestly have to say that when I see a guy in a suit with a smart phone, something just does not sit well with me. It's because with a flip, what do you do with it? Talk and text. It's a phone. It serves its function as a phone. What differentiates a smart phone? A lot of bells and whistles that make it more enjoyable.

That being said, I'm so clumsy with my new phone. When my roommate worked it over, using voice recognition, making words pop out, strange effects appearing as he touched it etc. my mind was blown. His use of it was in a completely different category. He capped it off saying "And that's why people don't use flip phones!" I think a few people took  offense when I said "Smart phones are like toys. I can't respect a guy in a suit playing with a toy."

Apparently it's a really good phone. I got it for free with the cheapest plan I could get with my provider.  But I get a lot of compliments and lots of people want to play with it and help me get it set up.

The last Respect Campaign event of the semester was the De-Stress event, and boy did I need it. It was like a celebration for all the volunteers who worked with us throughout the semester. We had food, announced the Leaders of the Month, we handed out pins for events, and we had karaoke. One girl that I have a competitive relationship with talked me into singing a duet with her of "Anything you can do I can do better".

This Thursday all the WALES staff are going to a Christmas celebration and they need relief staff. Guess who they hired? That's right, I'm going to be running the organization and getting paid for it. They also pulled a couple other people who did summer program with me. The team is back together again! Make way for the new generation!

Spice Rack

Last weekend, I helped a friend's sister move. Shewas tryingto get rid of a bunchof stuff, whichmeant I made major gain. I took home a garbage bag full of pots and pans, a serving tray, and a strainer.

The most prized catch, however, was the spice rack.

It's a set of glass bottles in a pair of shelves built to fit. There are metal engravings labeling which spice goes in what. A metal engraving is on each, shaped as whichever plant the bottled spice is supposed to grow from.

I had every spice to fit the rack, except Rosemary, Tarragan, and Coriander.

My roommate put garlic powder in the Coriander bottle.I confronted him on it, and he said that I "use garlic powder all the time" and that I "don't even know what Coriander is".

Whatever. I'm not discouraged.

Me and my friend were making pasta. Real simple stuff. Noodles and store-made sauce, you know? But we decided to crack out the spices. It was pointed out that we had spices now, and I had to remind that we always had the spices. They just weren'tin a lovely rack. We were excited to usethe rack, not the spices.

Tarragon is expensive, yeah? I bought that stuff purely for show.

And while we're at it, I bought a new phone. Here is my first upgrade, side-by-side:

Worst Week of College

Wow, what a week! I had two presentations, two papers, a proposal, and my client file. Six projects in five days. And you probably don't understand the magnitude of how huge the client file and proposal were. At the beginning of the week I realized I couldn't do it. I gave myself four hours sleep which I thought was more than I could afford, but I didn't sleep a wink. I just lay on my back doing deep breathing exercises while my heart hammered trying to convince myself that, worst come to worst, even if I failed out of SSW, I could still get two diplomas before I turned thirty, so whatever might happen, just don't die!

The next day I ran into a friend from the program on the bus and he looked rattled. I asked him how he was feeling and he said "I can't do it".

We wound up screaming at each other

"WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO US?!"
"WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE STRONGEST!"
"I CAN'T FAIL AT A TIME LIKE THIS!"

I showed up at placement and I was obviously rattled. One of the staff asked me how I was and I said "Not good" Told them I couldn't make this week. I told my partner placement student that I wasn't going to drag her down with me and that my last act as a college student would be to finish the proposal with her (which was a joint project). My supervisor scratched off whatever was on her schedule that morning and just wrote "Gryphon".

She pulled me aside, spent the whole morning going over my work with me and getting me sorted out, then she sent me home to get some rest and told me to take the next morning off to get work done.

My partner told me she'd finish the proposal from where we'd left off, and I should just focus on my own stuff.

The rest of the week was pure adrenaline. I was getting one or two hours sleep a day, and that was only when I passed out. Otherwise, I'd try to sleep, but my adrenaline would be going at it too hard and I'd just want to keep working. There was a point where I would literally write a sentence, collapse, pull myself up, write a sentence, collapse again.

I would say that that was a week I would never forget, but I think that in my memory, it will just be a painful, delirious haze.

Near the end, I found out that the teacher was giving extensions to anyone who asked for them. I was like "WHAT ABOUT EVERYTHING I'VE GONE THROUGH?! WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ALL THE SUPPORT I GOT?!" So I didn't take an extension and finished everything on time.

I got 100% on a paper I handed in a couple weeks back. My teacher had to question me to make sure that I didn't have anyone help me on it.

I also aced a simulation exercise. An actor came in and played the role of an eighteen year old with psychosis who was admitted to an institution, and we were social workers trying to get him to open up. Sessions were done in groups of six. Two people would co-counsel, then rotate out after ten minutes, another pair would rotate in from when the first pair left off, and then another pair would come in and take off from there.

Before going in, we saw the group from before us exiting, and they were none too happy. None of us had met the actor before, and he was brutal. He threw in a psychotic breakdown for each pair to give a little physical intimidation, and he was not shy to out anyone on their weaknesses. Me and my partner were the last pair to go up. We were the only pair not to have had a chance to practice with each other ahead of time, and neither of us really knew what direction to take things, since no one had made progress to that point.

Turns out me and my partner had a wonderful chemistry. Neither of us talked over the other one. We established a great relationship with the client. We managed to set goals. It was beautiful.

I've been told by my teachers that my success, both on the paper and in simulation have been going around the SSW office. I've been shouted out by the teachers.

I got one of my papers back from my week of delirium, and guess what? 100%. Apparently I just reached a new level.

But I bombed an exam a while back. Worse than I've ever done before. I hope that our group proposal brings my grade back up. Otherwise, one final assignment to bring me up.

Fire Alarms

Last week, the Respect Campaign hosted the Blood Donor Clinic and Remembrance Day. I showed up to donate blood for the clinic. I wasn't on duty so I didn't wear my vest, and I didn't drop my title once. At reception, I wanted to say "You know these people running your event? Yeeah, I'm their leader" but I didn't.

When waiting to give blood, I wound up sitting next to my Communications teacher whose class I got exempted from. I didn't recognize her though, because I was sitting in profile to her. I wound up having a conversation with a volunteer from my organization on the other side of her and she joined in. I had a whole conversation with her and only realized who she was after-the-fact.

Blood donations are really exclusive. You can't give blood if you're male and you've had sex with another man even once in your life. Someone  pointed out that if it's anal sex that's the issue, then women have that too sometimes, and that sex with another male doesn't necessarily mean anal. You can't give blood if your mother or grandmother is from Central America. You can't give blood if you've ever had sex with someone born in Africa. You can't give blood if you've ever had Malaria. The list goes on...

...And I'm not allowed to give blood.

The fire alarm went off when people were giving blood. I told the people around me "If I were an arsonist and wanted to hurt people, I would wait until a large number of people were in a room together, with people hooked up to machines so they couldn't evacuate immediately. I say there's a good chance this thing is legit." Then somebody ran up yelling "THIS IS NOT A DRILL. GET OUT OF THE BUILDING!"

Whatever it was, it was solved fast. The people who were giving blood weren't allowed to give it after their needle was removed, since you're not allowed to get needled twice in one day.

Later on, my house had the fire alarm go off while I was in the shower. Talk about having fire alarms go off at really inopportune times twice in one week.Turns out one of my roommates burnt some popcorn, and since our smoke alarm is connected directly to the fire station, we had firefighters in our house quickly.

Random Act of Kindness Day

Last Friday the Respect Campaign hosted Random Act of Kindness Day. Our volunteers facilitated a number of activities such as a plinko game that challenged passerbys to accept a randomly selected task, such as high-fiving a stranger, and continued to ask them to fill out a list of five acts of kindness starting with the plinko one, which could be submitted for the chance to win in a raffle.

We had people hold up messages on a whiteboard describing acts of kindness they had given or received, and had their photos taken for a slideshow.

We had a station teach people how to make paper flowers with notes with compliments, to be given to someone special. A flower was delivered to my desk in the student life office, with the message "Your Grizzly Adams beard is sexy".

We had RAK (Random Act of Kindness) on the Street, where people from our movement went around carrying signs with positive messages.

We had a Candy and Hot Chocolate Giveaway, and our partners gave popcorn and cotton candy.

I thought I would only be able to manage prep for the event, but my class was canceled, so I got to be around for five hours! Made up a bit for missing a week of work due to being in Block Placement and WALES. I manned the Respect Booth, explaining to anyone curious what the Respect Campaign is.

I am proud of how we did, we were bigger than last year!

The week before this, I facilitated a Respect Meet.  There was one on Monday and one on Wednesday, but I could only do the one on Monday since I had an exam for the first hour of the Wednesday one. I had to organize to leave a staff meeting at WALES to make the one on Monday, too.

During the Monday meeting, we had a discussion on Global Citizenship and what it means to us to help us prepare for Cultural Diversity Week. We went over the last meeting's Biweekly Respect Challenge, which was to do a Random Act of Kindness outside of the Respect Campaign. Mine was baking homemade bread for my coworkers. We then had a teambuilding activity where everyone chose an animal that represented them based on a list of animals and descriptions of their characteristics.

It led to some quite intimate discussion. I chose elephant, for my namesake in Mali. In Chisasibi, I was a fox. Objectively, looking at the list, I might be raven.

Elephant - Strong, powerful, and wise

Fox - Cunning, agile, quick-witted, diplomatic, wild; feminine in its magic of camouflage, shape-shifting and invisibility

Raven - Introspective, courageous, self-knowing, healing, protective, tricky, and magical

You can make elephant and fox fit, and I feel most like an elephant, but raven's description resonates with me most.

We also chose an animal to represent the Respect Campaign. During the meeting that I co-facilitated, we chose an animal with this descriptive:

"Cleansing, transformative, sensitive, medicinal, undiscernibly beautiful and powerful"

It's good, right? Try to guess the animal based on the description.

...

...

...

...Give up? It's the frog. How does that describe a frog? It's beyond me.

Our second group chose the dog, " Noble, faithful, loyal, trainable, protective, and guiding" A little easier to attach with what is traditionally associated with the animal.

After my exam on Wednesday, I dropped by the Respect Meet to see what the dynamic is like when I'm not facilitating. Did about an hour as a volunteer, which felt nostalgic. Watched my fellow Student Life Interns present my Engagement Plan. It was fun.

End of Naruto

If you remember my old LiveJournal blog, Lair of the Rat Sage, you might remember a number of posts regarding my opinions on a Japanese comic (manga) series called Naruto. My first girlfriend introduced me to it, and I took to it somewhat excessively for a time. As I grew older, I felt it was beneath my age and stopped speaking on it, although I never stopped reading. Only a couple of my friends know I read the series, when I accidentally left a discussion page open on my laptop. It became my only real "guilty pleasure".

The series ended when it became exactly fifteen years old. It ended seventeen years since it's pilot chapter, and exactly when the main character became seventeen in the manga. It was going to end on the aggravating number of 699, but the author was good enough to offer us a double-issue finale, so we got an extra chapter and get to end cleanly on the 700th. Chapter 699 wrapped up what was currently happening, and chapter 700 was an epilogue about 15 years in the future.

Over half my life it's been running, and I've followed it since I was sixteen... Nine years.

Since I started following it, I met my first girlfriend, graduated high school, broke up with my first girlfriend, met my father who I was estranged from and connected with his biological family who neither of us knew. Joined the Katimavik program and worked with the intellectually disabled in Summerside, PEI, then for the Regional Food Distribution Association in Thunder Bay, Ontario, then worked in Chisasibi, Cree Nation in North Quebec. Came back and worked in three factories, becoming a Machine Operator. My mother was diagnosed with Hepatitus C, then recovered from it. Joined Canada World Youth and worked in La Pocatiere, Quebec, as a horticulturalist, then went to Mali, West Africa and worked there. Met and broke up with my second girlfriend, had a falling out with my father. My Great Grandmother turned 100 and my Great Aunt passed away. Earned certificates in SafeTALK, 1st Aid and CPR Level C, Non Violent Crisis Intervention, Safe Management, WHMIS, Safe Food Handling and Smart Serve. Volunteered two years with the Respect Campaign and became a Respect Leader.  Completed the Human Services Foundation Program and a year of Social Services.

And through it all, I've followed Naruto. And now it's ended, probably the most consistent factor in my life.

This is the END OF AN ERA!

You probably don't care, but here's a summary of how it ended. Warning SPOILERS:

Naruto and Hinata got married. Sasuke and Sakura got married. Shikamaru and Temari got married. Ino and Sai got married. Chouji and the black girl that beat up Naruto in an alley got married.
Naruto and Hinata had two children, a son and a daughter, and they're both ugly. Sasuke and Sakura had a daughter. InoShikaChou and their respective partners created a new InoShikaChou. Chouji and Karui had a daughter, so they get the token female member of the team. Shikamaru and Temari's kid, and Naruto and Hinata's son, look and act almost exactly like Naruto and Shikamaru when they were 12. No one else is in a confirmed relationship or had children.

After Naruto and Sasuke blasted each other's arms off, Tsunade created a prosthetic for Naruto out of a White Zetsu. Sasuke declined the offer of a prosthetic for no confirmed reason.

For some reason, all the Kage except Gaara stepped down after the war. Kakashi took over after Tsunade, ruled for about 15 years and stepped down voluntarily so Naruto could become Hokage.
Shino got a Star Trek Geordi La Forge visor and became a teacher at the academy, which he apparently got when Shikamaru quit to become the Hokage's advisor. Akamaru got old. For some reason I thought he'd age in human years, but he aged in dog years. Tenten owns a weapon shop but can't sell anything because the world is too peaceful. Rock Lee has a student and replicated his and Gai's relationship.

Gai was permanently disabled and is in a wheelchair. Kishi really should have let him die in a blaze of glory.

The new Kage lineup is:
Hokage: Naruto
Kazekage: Gaara
Raikage: Darui
Tsuchikage: Kurotsuchi
Mizukage: Choujurou

Konohamaru is Naruto and Hinata's son (Bolt's) sensei.

Unanswered questions:

How could Naruto and Sasuke deactivate Infinite Tsukuyomi when they needed the sun and moon seals to do so, and they'd just exploded those seals off each other?

Why did Spiral Zetsu die when Infinite Tsukuyomi was deactivated and what was Spiral Zetsu in the first place?

How could Darui unseal Samui and Atsui from the Sage's tools?

Why did Kaguya need an army of White Zetsus?

How did Gyuuki grow back his missing tooth?

All in all, the series has been a journey, with ups and downs but a charm that captivated audiences to invest themselves emotionally and dedicate their time. I don't know how I'll manage without my weekly Naruto fix.

Cooking Goals

I flunked my cooking goals. I burned my cornbread

And my pumpkin bread looks more like pumpkin cake

Nice photos though, eh? Really, the pumpkin bread was a delightful, delicious mistake which a number of people enjoyed. I made a taco dip for the Halloween party at WALES tomorrow, and it seems to have turned out well. I'm baking bread right now for my Random Act of Kindness, which I will give to my WALES coworker and my fellow Student Life Interns at our staff meeting tomorrow.

Halloween Costumes

I got a costume. I'm going as The Emperor of Evil (Only XXL in Wal Mart). I was pretty satisfied with it, but then I looked at the little tag with the photo of what it's supposed to look like, and it had a hood and a medallion. I felt better when it said "Accessories seen in photo may not be included with the costume" but then I read "Includes: Hooded robe, chest drape, caplet, upper face mask, medallion, gloves, belt."

I got ripped off!

I almost went as a lumberjack. That's easy, 'cause I just have to wear a flannel shirt and my suspenders, pop the rim on my toque and buy a toy ax, 100% lumberjack. One year I didn't dress up and just wore a flannel and popped my toque and people were like "Yo, that costume is legit!" Too easy.

But I have a friend who's going as a "sexy lumberjack" and uhhhh.... I can't be an unspecialized lumberjack next to that.

When I joked that the only Halloween toy ax I would find would be a demonic-stylized one, I considered going as an "evil lumberjack".

I stitched up my backpack. I got a backpack last Christmas, and it began to fall apart depressingly fast. The new tear seemed so ugly. but once it became wide enough that I could pull out my Family Ties That Bind textbook without unzipping it, I began to see it as a convenience. In the end, it was still too ugly, and I stitched it up. First I used dollar store thread, and it tore pretty fast. I had a really demotivating evening where I kept trying to stitch it and it wouldn't hold. Eventually I resorted to using fishing line. If it's good enough to hold a fish, it's good enough to hold some textbooks!

All the guys in my house use hygiene products that say "for men" on them. All the cheapest products have really feminine titles for some reason, like "Silkience Salon Formula" as if you have to pay extra to retain your masculinity and clean yourself at the same time. But I got a thing for shea butter, which comes from Mali, and around here it's considered a feminine product. So in the bathroom I've got my shea butter body wash and hand soap next to all my roommates sexually-insecure male-qualifying ripoff cleaning products.

They'll regret it when I have better skin later in life.

Respect Meetings

We had our first two Respect meetings last week that weren't run by our supervisor. I co-facilitated both of them, with a different partner each day. Both went fine, but the meetings were pretty small. We had ten volunteers in our first meeting and five in our second. We had a speaker come in both days and she was good enough to present to such small groups without complaint. She explained the background of Random Act of Kindness Day (this November 9th), which is what the meetings were about. Our next big project is facilitating RAK Day celebrations and events.

I'm being made to celebrate Halloween this year. I don't hardly know what an adult is supposed to dress up as, or where to get material for a costume. And I should probably get that figured out this weekend, since I may not have time during the work week.

Got block placement next week, which means I will be doing placement throughout the week. I also didn't have any projects due last week. Feels like vacation. Although if I hadn't been exempted from my communications class, I'dhave something due this week. And since I have the assignment to develop an Engagement Plan for Respect, and since doing four hours in meetings and five in the office is longer than the two hour comm class, I still don't have a lighter work load.

SSW Year 2 Grades

I've had some grades back by now. I got my first essay back, which was on an ethical dilemma that I've faced. I got 90%. Real happy, especially since I was uncertain if I was taking the right direction with it. I got my preliminary proposal back for a group me and a student partner will be running at my placement. 100%. Was on top of the world until I realized that a bunch of other people got the same grade.

When my partner boasted about our accomplishment to the WALES staff, I said "Wanna feel less special?" and explained how we weren't all that amazing considering how high the class average was. So the staff made me write our accomplishment on a piece of paper and put it in the "Awesome Jar".

Got a group assignment back today. 65%. Since passing is 60% and I need to retain a 65% average to stay employed at the school, I wasn't thrilled by this grade. Both my group members were really strong, too. None of us know where we went wrong, so we're looking forward to getting our feedback.

Did our first midterm exam today. I felt unprepared. It was a case study and I didn't feel completely lost on any questions, but not completely comfortable with any of them either. So we'll see how that goes.

Submitted my Field Placement Contract today, which comprises my educational goals, agreed upon and signed by my supervisor.

All in all, based on how intimidated I was at the beginning of the year, having completed two papers, two assignments and an exam with mostly positive results feels good.

Bingo

So my SD card stopped working for my camera and I decided to  go buy a new one. But by the time I reached the store, I realized that I hadn't brought my card with me for reference on what I should buy, and there were a number of options. I saw there were 4 GB, 8 GB, 16 GB, 32 GB, and 64 GB cards (or something like that). I wasn't willing to go home and return by bus to learn the answer, so I decided to take a guess.I figured that I was only taking photos, so it shouldn't take much power compared to those who take videos, but I didn't want to go back and regret the new card, so I took an 8 GB,the second-lowest card for sale.

When I got home, I checked my card to see how close I'd come to it. My old card was 1 GB. They don't even  sell cards that low-powered anymore.

I got exempted from my communications class.When you get exempted from something, it feels like passing all the exams and all the papers at once without even trying. But I swapped my work hours at the school onto the time I would have been attending class, so all that means is that I actually get breaks during the school day, instead of clocking in an hour here and there at the office.

I went to a bingo hall for the first time in my life. Beforehand, I'd only ever used one board at a time, but here I had to use six boards at once... and that was easy mode. There were people using 18 boards at once. Don't know how they managed.

I was also unprepared to use the bingo lingo. After ordering the boards, we had the option to buy additional boards "in-book" and "out of book". I wound up ordering "one of each, out of book" but I'm glad I managed to figure that out while I was still standing in line.

Also, I'm used to any line being a "bingo" but according to this place, certain boards have certain calls at what a "bingo" is. Sometimes it's a line, sometimes it's an inner square, sometimes it's the whole board, etc

They also would ask anyone who got a "screw ball", a "pinball" or a "Daffy Duck" to call it out. Never figured out what any of that meant.

And there was a "rapid-fire round" where they would shout numbers at a ridiculous speed. I sat in on a round before contributing, thought the rapid-fire was normal, and was real scared to participate.

Milk

Hey, remember how I made a post about how each grocery store has a different brand of milk, and nobody talks about it? And how there are usually several brands of soy milk in each market at the same price range as each other, but cow milk at it's standard price only gets one brand per location?

First of all, my aunt Lynna explained in a comment that this is because the each of the large commercial cow milk brands come from the same source, even if they're given a different name store-by-store.

But I also mentioned that the grocery by my student placement has a roster of value brand milks, including one that is different from any I'd seen before; Steen's Dairy.

(Did I use that semicolon correctly? I don't know how to use semicolons)

And on Steen Dairy's milk bag, they have a description of the Steen history:

"During the Great Depression a young hockey player named Fred Steen was asked to play hockey in Erin and found a job at the local creamery. In 1944, he bought the dairy portion of the creamery and moved it to the main street of Erin and Steen's Dairy began."

There's a second section but I won't bother you with it. I'll just mention that they refer to that as the "Fred Steem legacy". Kind of the most boring legacy I've ever heard, but there's something charming about how they so proudly advertise it. Appartently the brand comes from local Ontario farms, which is in keeping with the old-school feel of the market by my placement.

While we're on the topic of milk, I found a bag of milk in my fridge that's been sitting there since last year's roommates. This place has had such a high turnover rate, with three generations of people since I moved in, that it's hard to keep track of what belongs to who. There are a couple of girls using the basement, and there was a guy living in a room over the summer, so our three milk pitchers made sense. But then the girls moved their stuff to the downstairs fridge and there were still three milk pitchers. Then my other roommate moved out, my new roommates moved in, and there were still three milk pitchers. At this point I realized there was a problem.

Turns out, in the most recent generation of roommates, I'me the only milk drinker.

I figured it out fast enough that summer-roommates milk didn't spoil, but it looks like the mysterious third pitcher, and another bag at the back of the fridge, did not belong to either the new roommates or my summer roommates, which means they've been there since the last school year.

I'm the only one keeping track of what belongs to who, it seems. Makes no sense there are five types of jam in the fridge. Who loves jam that much?

I'm back at home right now. Since I celebrated in Kitchener last week, I had a home celebration this week.

The person with the ugly sunflower groomed it, so now there are no petals coming out of it's face.

And the cement pigeon mystery was solved by my mother. I'd been showing Guelph natives going to my campus pictures of the birds and everyone was freaked, not having noticed them before.

Here's a Guelph Mercury article on them:

http://www.guelphtribune.ca/community/four-sculptures-to-land-in-core/

I finished my first paper of the year last week. We all had to write something on an ethical dilemma that we've had to face.

And last week we had to wear a device that gave us auditory hallucinations, to help us empathize with people who hear voices. We had to walk around campus and have normal interactions with people, and we weren't allowed to let people know that we were hearing voices

It was not as overwhelming as I feared, although it was still a powerful experience with surprising influences on my interactions and ability to  manage myself. A lot of other people had more difficulty with it than myself.

25

So yesterday I turned a quarter century. Went out with some friends who all kind of gaped at my age (group of people between ages 20-24) I was reassured that I didn't look 25, but really, people used to think I was 27 when I was 17. People guessed 30 when I was 20. So I suspect I look at least 25. And I don't see anything wrong with looking 25 either. Anything younger is legally considered a youth in Ontario. I think 25 is still youth (25 and younger). You don't want to be so young that you have to watch special videos before being assigned work because you're considered "vulnerable" due to your lack of maturity. 25 is prime, and I'm going to enjoy this next year, I think.

At my placement, they baked me a cake to celebrate my birthday, and they sang me Happy Birthday. It was good times.

I looked over my previous posts since Summer Program ended and I don't think I spoke on my school schedule. Well.

Monday and Tuesday are placement, so that's a full day of work both days. Then Monday is 9-5 classes with a one hour break, so that's another full day. Thursday I just have one class, and Friday I have 8-3, so that's almost full day as well. But because I'm a Respect Intern, that means I work and extra three hours on Thursdays, so that day almost fills up, and then on Friday I go in for an hour at my lunch break and an hour after classes. So that becomes a full day without a break. And of course I have almost weekly Respect meetings. So ugh...

Get Involved Fair

Today I was officially required to wear my Respect vest for the first time. I was told to supervise the Get Involved Fair, volunteers were told to report to me, the whole bit.

The Get Involved Fair was an event where representatives of agencies in the helping professions came to facilitate informational booths on their organizations. We were handing out pieces of paper, on which people could collect stickers from each booth. If they went to three booth, they could enter a raffle to win some prizes.

I finished my Segu book. I think it will be my last book that I read for pleasure until the end of the school year. There's just so many text readings, I won't feel like doing any kind of reading in whatever spare time I get.

Mom took some photos of the giant Guelph cement pigeon to prove my sanity:

Camera Drone

Last week I was asked to be in a video at my school. Being in promotional material seems to be something I get to do as a Respect Intern. I'm also on a "Get Involved" poster at the school.

Video was pretty basic in terms of my involvement. They just got me to walk down a sidewalk with two other people, having a conversation while a couple of people walked past us from the other side, doing the same thing. Basically, I just acted as atmosphere.

The way they shot it was interesting though. They had a drone with four propellers fly above us with a camera. It was pretty Star Wars. They warned us not to look at it, and said it would sound like a swarm of bees flying overhead.

But it sounds more like a chainsaw and when it's slowly flying toward you and you've never seen the drone in flight, it's impossible not to glance. So we all did and had to retake the shot.

Second time around, we had to take it again because it was apparently hovering over my head. That put me off a little, the implication that they weren't in full control of these four spinning blades hovering above my head, which I'm not allowed to look at.

Third take and we got it. Afterward, though, they lost control of the drone and it flew sideways into a tree and carved up a branch. I got out of there at my first opportunity.

Guelph Bird Statue

I was in Guelph over the weekend and when I was walking past the city bus terminal I noticed a giant statue of a bird perched on a lamppost. At first I thought I was seeing things. It looked old and deformed, with yellow paint peeling off it's wings. The bus terminal itself is only a few years old, and this bird looked older than it. I wondered how long I'd been walking past it and failing to notice it.

I met up with someone later that day and asked her if she'd seen the giant bird statue at the terminal. She said she'd seen it for the first time this past week and had wondered if it had been there a long time and she hadn't noticed. Together, we decided it must be recent, since both of us had noticed it at around the same time.

Later on we went to the terminal and saw the statue. But it looked different and was in a slightly different place from where we remembered. We were weirded out.

But we kept walking to the place we saw the original statue and there was one there, too. So we could scrap the idea thta the statue was alive and changed it's perch, and concluded that ther are actually two statues.

The birds are about as tall as a person, and much larger overall. They aren't majestic birds either. They look like giant pigeons with flaking white paint on their wings. Why are they there.

I took some photos, but my SD card won't upload to my computer. Half the time, the computer will make a sound to acknowledge the card. An eighth of the time, an option will show up for me to open the card. But it didn't goive me an option to upload, and when I tried copy/pasting it only gave me a shortcut to the card itself, so I can't upload the images.

My camera reads the card half the time. My mother's computer could read the card, but mine can't. I don't know if I need a new camera, SD card, or computer.

Plus even trying to read the card crashed my computer twice, and I managed to do it successfully only once. I've been working at this for over an hour. Very irritating.

I saw a really ugly sunflower. Should have taken a photo of that. My neighbour that grows giant sunflowers was not as fortuitous this year as he was the last. Last year he grew flowers that were substantially taller than me. Like, maybe eight feet tall. This year, they are only as tall as me. The only one to have blossomed so far has petals growing from within the are that the seeds grow. Just awkward, random petals sprouting from the "face". Ugh...

September 10th

Remember how last year, a friend of mine passed away suddenly due to an unexpected illness? Well, this past September 10th would have been her 19th birthday. It was also the birthday of her mother. Sometimes life feels too cruel to be coincidence.

I have another friend who has fallen ill with something which I'm to understand medical professionals have failed to diagnose. Another young woman, 22 years old.

And then of course we have September 11th.

Food

When I was making the coleslaw and had just had the other 5 guys move in, the household had previously been living like it was sharing fridge space with much fewer people, and my old roommate who'd moved out left a lot of food. So when I moved in my cabbages, carrots, onions, and dressing, I felt I needed to make space for it. My solution was to eat a whole bag of Romaine lettuce and a bag of baby carrots. Then I proceeded to hand-grate coleslaw for three hours. One of my roommates waited until about the third hour and was like "Dude, how much salad are you going to eat?"

I realized the guy had just seen me eat four bowls of salad and had no idea I planned to share the coleslaw. Must've thought all I ever do is eat salad.

It's hard when people leave you random food. I got two things of ice cream syrup, so now I'm going to have to buy ice cream to get rid of the syrup. And three types of jam were left behind. And I'm going to have to get something to dip in all this Thai sauce.

I made banana bread for the first time. My roommates commented on how I'm always experimenting in the kitchen and asked me how I know to do so much. I got called a "great cook". I don't feel particularly knowledgeable but am grateful for the praise.

I haven't bought meat from the grocery for months. I've developed some weird rule that I can't prepare meat but can eat it if I go out. So it's like a celebratory thing, not a staple of my daily diet, as it used to be. I don't know if this endeavor is useful at all. I feel pretty much the same.

Had my first day of placement today. First week is just paperwork and office stuff. I've been through it twice before because of my previous student placement and because of the summer program but my fellow placement student hasn't, and there are three university students working in main office going through it too, so they have me there as a show of solidarity or something.

Coleslaw

Had my Respect Leader training session yesterday. We aren't called Respect anymore, we're Student Life Leaders, and since that's the organization name, and Student Life Leader Leader would be a clumsy job title, I am actually a Student Life Leader Intern.

I spent three hours making a coleslaw for the Year 1 SSW BBQ. I don't have a food processor so I hand grated everything.

September Schedule

The past few days have been hectic. I got four new roommates, I caught up with an old friend, I went on a date, I had my first day of classes, I did Student Life training, I got my student card replaced and my four-month bus pass put on it. I've got a Field Meeting for my student placement tomorrow and I have my Respect Leader training. I'm partially in charge of registration of the First Year BBQ, and then I have the BBQ the next day. I will also probably see someone about a contract through EAF.

Before getting my student card replaced, I was told it would cost $10, $25, $20, and that it was a free service. Made me wonder if they just kind of eyeball you, decide on a price and give it. Because I paid $12, not any of the given prices. Still worth it.

SSW Meet

I got to go to an SSW meet yesterday since I'm not working anymore. Now I get to work with the team in charge of registration for the BBQ. It was good seeing the old crew again.

I also got to drop off that paperwork for Student Life which I only managed to scan in before.

I tried to get my student card reprinted but apparently they won't have the machine in until next week, so I'll have to do it then.

ALS Ice Bucket Challenge

 Recently, I was nominated to do the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. I had to find a bucket, ice, something to videotape with, and someone to videotape me within 24 hours, when I'd got the challenge at night and when I had work the next day. Wound up postponing it to the last hour, but I did it.

The guy I had taping me shut it off after I'd dumped the ice, so I had to take a second video with the nominations. I almost decided to do it twice, but thought that would cheapen the event.

I really do hate my voice. I finish all my sentences with a high note, as if I'm asking a question.

Forgot a lot of the things I was going to say. Should have gone in with a script.

Camp Over

This was my last day working with participants through the summer program. This job has been the most intellectually and emotionally involving experience, and the most most challenging, since coming back from Mali. I've got a three day wrap-up week and then I'm finished with my staff team, too. Very weird feeling.

Got an interview next week to do some part-time work with an individual during the school year.

The 2nd Year SSW are supposed to organize a BBQ for the 1st years, but because of my work, I missed both meetings about organizing it and had to figure out something to bring for the potluck by texting some of the people involved. And I can't do set-up for the program orientation because it's on the 26th, and my last day is the 27th.

Back From Impeesa

I'm back!

It was a really good experience to be placed in  a full-immersion setting in a natural environment (like what I had in Chisasibi and Mali) combined with doing work in my favoured field. It was like paradise, although definitely challenging at times.

We cooked, cleaned, played sports, went on hikes, did crafts etc. The best element of course, was all the dynamic personalities of the participants. But I'm not allowed to speak on that.

Before I left, I had to get some paperwork in to school for my position as Respect Leader the Wednesday of last week. It was frustrating because I live right next to the campus, but all the time that they're open, I'm working, so I've got zero access. I decided to see if a scan would do, but when I went onto my computer, I realized that even though I hooked up my printer/photocopier/scanner to my new computer and I've used the printer since, I've never used the scanner, and the scan shortcut was not on my new computer.

So I tried to look it up and I found it, but all my computer would say was that it was functioning fine. It wouldn't give me the option to scan, thou.

Thought to go across to the school and use their resources but realized that they have only printer/photocopiers, with scanners available only during work hours.

I thought to try booting up my old computer, even though last time I tried, both my account and the admin account were becoming unusable and requiring frequent resets, and most of the time it would make a weird screaming sound and stop working when I tried to log in.

But I tried it and to my relief, it worked. My trusty old laptop worked once more just for me.

But when I scanned the forms and tried sending them by email, it bounced. I tried emailing someone else from Student Life and that email also bounced.

I desperately tried emailing a few more times and one went through. And I got a message saying the reciprocant was on vacation.

But it was okay because she'd be back during the week before the due date. I just had to leave and trust things would go well. I left them my cell number with the thought that I could get my roommates to bring the papers in during the work week if things didn't go well.

Things went well enough. The scanned forms are enough to get the paperwork going.but they might need an original signature later on. At least I have my job.

But I was packing for the overnight at the same time and was distracted enough to do an imperfect job. Day I went in, I realized at the last moment that I forgot to pack bedding. But since I was at the EAF office near WALES and I visited WALES before going in, they actually hooked me up with blankets, sheets and pillows. It was pretty slick. Brought them their stuff back today and I'll hopefully remember to bring my own next week at the overnight.

Camp Impeesa

Just a reminder to everyone, but I'll be going away for five days to overnight camp at Camp Impeesa So I won't have Internet, so don't expect blog updates.

We got to check the place out last week. Looks pretty spacious. We were told the name means "The Wolf That Never Sleepss" and was a nickname given to Robert Baden-Powell, the guy who started Scouts, when he was fighting in South Africa.

However, wolves don't exist in Africa and the actual translation is "Hyena" which is NOT a compliment. Sounds like Baden-Powell took a name given to him by his enemy and built it up in the most positive light he could:

-A hyena is a wild dog in Africa
-A wolf is a wild dog in North America
-"Hyena" could be "wild dog" translated to "wolf"
-I've seen hyenas running around at night and haven't seen them asleep
-You could consider them to be "wolves that never sleep"
-That sounds hardcore. I'll tell people that's what "Impeesa" means

But when I learned the meaning of this name, in my Segu book, the character the story is currently following, Malobali Traore, had fallen into service of the Ashanti people. The Ashanti were involved in the battle where Baden-Powell earned his title. So I'm a Traore, and my book has the lead Traore fall into service of the Ashanti people when I'm headed out to work at a place named after an Ashanti word. Coincidence?

Well, all I know is that the Ashanti were involved. Despite the Scouts being humble enough to admit that Baden-Powell was wrong about the translation and that the literal one is an insult, I cannot find which language "Impeesa" comes from. Aggravating.

I found out who killed my sunflower! Arg!

Stuff I Brought Back

So since I was back, I was able to pick up my health card and credit card. I had to activate my credit card by calling a number. All went smoothly. Guy on the other end was the most enthusiastic customer service representative I've ever encountered! Wish I remembered his name.

"Hello, how may I improve your day?"
"Sorry, you must get this all the time, but you have one of the most AWESOME names I have ever heard. "Sibbald" very British, and then "Gryphon" you don't need me to tell you how awesome."
"I'll spare you the earful, since you mentioned the word I was waiting for."
"Let me tell you about a mistake I made when I started using my credit card."

As if he was actually invested in doing a good job or something.

I also picked up my beard trimmer charger, my DS charger, some tupperware I'd left behind, and brought some decorative items for my room.

Played some online game with my brother and his friends, which was a new experience. Looking into getting a headset adapter, since my computer doesn't have the correct equipment for audio/visual communication. I think it's the audio which is the problem. Interferes with me Skyping, too.

Student Vs Regular Fare

Somebody ripped my sunflower out of the ground!! I noticed it was gone today, looked at where it was, and there's a hole in the ground where it used to be.

I get a four day weekend, since the day program ended. We'll have three days of programming next week for the overnight camp, and then we'll have two-weeks of overnight.

I'm back in Guelph. Since I lost my student card, the guy said I'd have to pay the regular fare. Want to know the difference between a regular ticket for a round trip and a student one? Student is $17, regular is $45!! Yowch! If I wind up working in Kitchener, I'm never visiting Guelph again! It's too expensive! I might never stop being a student, just because it's cheaper to live with the student discounts than it is to work and and earn enough to live without them!

Some exaggeration. There are tricks to buying cheap without a student discount, like buying a week in advance or buying in bulk. I'll just have to be a bit smarter. And I wound up getting the student discount anyway because the girl at the other register remembered me.

We got to go to a water park last Friday. I got to go down the Lazy River, got to go into the wave pool, and got to go down water slides. It's been forever since I've got to go down a slide that size! I enjoyed it all, and felt childishly playful.

Broke my Bed

Somehow I've lost my student card. Last place I remember using it is at TD when I used it to get my student credit card. I went back and asked them if I'd left it there but no luck. Get one card and lose another, huh.

Today was kind of disappointing, made plans that fell through, and had back-up plans which also fell through. Then I got home, sat on my bed and the bed broke. Now I'm sleeping on a mattress on the floor.

I kind of thought that might happen. My bed frame was four pieces of wood nailed together with one placed overtop. It had already broken once before and I "fixed it by shifting around the top board so that not a lot of pressure was placed on the broken part.

I'd put that plant-holder that came with the room in the area between the boards under the mattress. I'd always thought that the area under the bed would make a good last-resort storage container. Oh well, there are worse losses, I guess.

I've got a table next to my bed that I keep my laptop and printer on. It was at a really good level to me when I was lying in bed. Now I'm sitting cross-legged on my mattress to be face-level with my laptop. Little disappointing.

But none of that matters because THIS HAPPENED

OHHHH YEAH! SUNFLOWER! Where'd this guy come from?! Who's gardening at our place?! What?!

All my sunflowers had died, but this guy shows up out of the blue! Ohhhh, it's going to be a good year after all!

Toronto Trips

Last Friday we went to the Toronto Science Centre, which I've been to once before. Aside from viewing the exhibits, we went to the Imax Theatre and watched a documentary on lemurs. This was pretty cool to me, because I'm lame and into that kind of thing, but I still couldn't help but think that the Imax Theatre, with it's huge, curved screen that covers a person's entire sense of vision, including peripheral, was downplayed on something as low-energy as a documentary, and made me consider it's potential if it decided to feature something more action-oriented.

The bus ride was tough, just because of the length and because I'd decided to drink coffee beforehand. Gotta be in my top ten "need a bathroom" experiences.

This week we got to watch a Blue Jays game. They faced the Red Sox and beat them soundly. I avoided drinking coffee before the drive to Toronto, but found myself having a hard time fighting the urge to nod off. Can't win.

And then today we got to go bowling and swimming. Went swimming at the Waterloo Recreation Centre, which is different from our usual place. Instead of having a single pool that gets deeper and deeper, it has two separate pools, one that is shallow and one that is deep. It also had a "warm pool" which is like a hot tub, but big enough to classify as a pool. Met a friend there who is working as a lifeguard, which was pretty neat.

There is a nature trail between my house and the nearest grocery, which I've walked by frequently over the past two years and have always intended to visit but never found the time to. Last week, I finally got around to it. I walked up and down the better-traveled path and then walked into the rough. It reminded me of my youth, when I found so much fulfillment in exploring the wilderness around me.

Segu Book

A long time ago, I made a post wondering if it would be possible to make a restaurant based on Malian cuisine, since other cultures have made in-Canada restaurants based on their home food, adapted to Canadian taste. Well check this out, a list of Malian recipes:

http://www.celtnet.org.uk/recipes/mali.php

I never ate most of that. And where's the Toh? The sour cake dipped in fish sauce. And under the spice list, where's the Pima? That hot sauce that would turn your mouth on fire.

And check this out, a Bambara Wikipedia:

http://bm.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ny%C9%9B_f%C9%94l%C9%94

My Segu book is pretty amazing. The main family is of the Traore tribe, which my host family belonged to. I've found out that our sacred tree is the dubale, in which the spirits of our ancestors rest. Our motto is "Traore, Traore, Traore--the long-named man need not pay to cross the river". Our totemic animals are the black monkey, the dog-faced baboon, the crowned crane, and the panther. So don't any of you let me kill those animals, or I'll be cursed!

I found out that the Samake tribe are our enemies, but since my nickname was "Elephant" and the Bambara word for elephant is "Sama", and "Samake" means "Son of Elephant", this means that my signature animal belongs to my enemy's tribe! This is what happens when you let a Diarra nickname you!

Oh, and Diarra was the name of a special lion, so the Diarra clan that lived with us in Karadie and with which we shared Cousinage is associated with the lion.

I've learned the reason why "Mali" is Bambara for "Hippo". Turns out the Malinke are a tribe that were represented by the hippo. In this book, the Malinke are a proud but defeated people, who once ruled the lands but were defeated by the Songhay, who were in turn defeated by the Segu. Funny how they don't acknowledge the fall of the Mali Empire, when it turns out they later make such a comeback.

Segu was the place of my counterpart's upbringing, too, and it's the starting place of the book. Also, he married a Samake woman, enemy of the Traore. Now the Segu Empire is reduced to being a region within the Malinke Empire.

Apparently the current political turmoil with Timbuktu being taken by the Tuareg is old news. In fact, Timbuktu is apparently named after a woman who originally ruled it, and the meaning is "woman with a big naval". It's history reflects a woman who is fought over by men, but who belongs to no one. It has been in the hands of the Tuaregs several times before and lost.

I may have already said this, but the ruler of Segu is Monzon Diarra, which  is the same name as the son of the chief of Karadie. And the wife of the person that the book originally centres on is of the Kulibaly clan, which is even more noble than the Traore. That left me a little bitter... Sedio is not better than I am!

The Traore, Diarra, and the Kulibaly were the three tribes to live in Karadie. Such a happy coincidence that they are such a focus in the book! With Traore being the main chaaracters!

I remember building stoves out of Banko and using it in the fields. It was so casually spoken on, that I thought it must be a regular building material. But coming back, no one knew what it was. Turns out, it's a Bambara word meaning a combination of water, clay, dung, straw, and sand.

And the word Pagne, which is a type of cloth you bring to the tailor so he can make your clothes!

I get to read about Toh, the food I spoke on above, courage sharing, and the concept of one person holding multiple names, which I've spoken on in this book.

So cool!

Debit Card

Last Wednesday, a bank machine ate my debit card. It said "Temporarily out of service, please try again later" or something like that. I looked down to see my card having been ejected and in the process of being retracted. So painful to see your card being swallowed past the point of no return. I hammered on the "cancel" and "correct" buttons on the ATM keyboard, but as you can imagine, that won't do anything after the machine has logged you out.

I actually took out a pen, wrote "OUT OF SERVICE" on an envelope and stuck it to the machine. I decided to believe that, instead of fate picking on me, I was actually there to prevent others from having their cards eaten, since not everyone might be so considerate as to leave an out of order notice.

And then the next day we had a staff meeting, so work ran late. We let out at seven and the bus ride is roughly an hour long, with the bank closing at eight. I managed to get there ten minutes before closing. The woman at front desk, instead of offering to retrieve my card, said she'd print me out a new one. I've actually had my card eaten by the same machine in the past (when that happened, they said it had never happened before) and then, they'd just gotten it back for me. This time, I had it redone with the new Visa adaptation, which means I can spend money online.

But the Debit-Visa isn't an actual credit card, just an adaption to my debit card that allows me to spend online.  However, she also offered me the Student Visa card, which is a credit card available to students. Remember how in the past,  I went through the credit card application phase and was denied because even though my credit rating was good, I didn't have enough of it? Well, this time around, I didn't even have to do an interview and see if I'd be accepted. We were able to complete the acceptance process in what remained of the ten minutes that were left after I'd had my debit card reprinted.

Leaving Guelph

When leaving Guelph, I put off packing to the last minute, and so I was able to find my beard trimmer, but not my beard trimmer charger. I just trimmed my beard, but I don't know how many trims it has in it. I'm scared of one day it running out when my beard is half-trimmed, and then I have to walk around with half my beard mechanically trimmed and half of it manually trimmed. I don't know how that would look but I assume it would be bad.

 I also brought my detachable keyboard but forgot my computer mouse.

I feel like I should point out that even though my sunflowers died, our zucchini plants and one of the broccoli plants are doing great. The tomato plants are doing okay and the pepper plants are working out way better than last year. The peas and beans are dead. But since my sunflowers are dead, so is my ambition to the garden. Blech.

I just ate a gyro for the first time in my life. At the Transfers Cafe in the downtown bus terminal, but whatever, still counts. It was shockingly good. The best thing I've ever had through the Transfers Cafe.

I got my first paycheque last  Friday.  Really exciting.

Last week, we got to go bowling. I'm a terrible bowler, but this time around, I did alright. I usually always mix up my style, because there isn't a way that I can do consistently well, but I think I've found one now. I even got a strike, but I was so excited, that when I turned around and ran up to give everyone high fives, I tripped over a table.

Got to watch the movie How to Train Your Dragon 2. I watched the original one in Katimavik. I remember my group giving the original high praise, but I found it more or less unmemorable. Viking theme, nerdy protagonist, dragons are initially the enemy but the protagonist learns to befriend them. I actually think the sequel was better. It was a little bit less predictable, but I found the protagonist was difficult to empathize with and the antagonist should have been sympathetic but wasn't convincingly so. The comic relief was hit-and-miss. The best parts were through the lead support characters and some of the plot.

We had a visit from someone who showed us exotic pets, such as lizards, snakes, tarantulas, scorpions, and tortoises. Loved it. We also got to watch a magic show. When you're young, you think that you'll grow up to understand all the magic tricks, but now as an adult, I'm stuck with the frustration of being mystified and knowing I will probably never grasp it!

African Lion Safari

I'm home for the weekend for the first time since I started work. All my sunflowers are dead and nobody told me!! I brought them into this world and let them die! Bad karma.

Since I'm here, I can bring back a few things I forgot last time, like my dress pants, my beard trimmer (had to go back to scissors for a month), my detachable keyboard and my computer mouse.

The Friday before last Friday I got to go to African Lion Safari. I haven't been there since I was a kid. Since I'm not allowed to take photos of participants, I never take my camera to work and it didn't occur to me that there's lots of cool photo opportunities that don't involve participants. Oh well.

I got the same sense of familiarity when I arrived there that I did at the Butterfly Conservatory. All the little details you don't bother to hold in your conscious memory, but which bubble up when reintroduced. The lake where the elephants swim was the first thing I saw, and my first thought was that the tables next to the lake were the same (or at least the same design) as when I'd been there as a child.

I appreciated all the African trivia way more now than I did as a child, for obvious reasons. They have zones in the safari set aside for specific countries. The Watuzu Cattle or however it's spelled, were cool because they were the same as the cattle I'd see every day in Mali.

They have a newborn giraffe there, the first in Canada to be born through artificial insemination. They are very proud.

They have a zone for the Americas. That kind of bothered me. This is the African Lion Safari. I don't want to think about the Americas. They had bison, deer, moose etc in that zone. I guess those are some pretty cool animals, regardless.

I also noticed all of their elephants are Asian elephants, not African. And in the Birds of Prey exhibit, they had birds from every continent.

They made the Zebra sound pretty lame. They aren't as intelligent and don't have the endurance of regular horses, and nobody knows why they have stripes.

The girl rhinos were hanging around the male rhino, which is pretty rare, because apparently their male rhino has a bad personality and the girl rhinos don't like spending time with him.

We went to the Parrot Paradise, Birds of Prey, and Elephant Walk (or something like that) shows. When I was a kid, there was a show where they asked a bunch of kids to come up and race this vulture. The claim was that it would not use it's wings and still beat us kids in a footrace. Well, I was beating it, and it used it's wings to get by me! I was so angry.

Until this recent trip, I'd wondered if I had deluded myself with childish fantasy into believing that I could beat the bird. But I got to go back to the show, and they did the same thing. When they asked who believed the vultures would when and who believed the kids would, I cheered for the kids.

And I was right! The vultures used their wings and still lost to most of the kids! And the people running the show bluffed and called a tie! I don't know why they insist on keeping this stunt going. Those vultures are terrible runners.

I also remember how at the elephant show, when mounting the elephant, the woman ripped her pants. This time around, the woman failed to full mount the elephant and dangled off it while two assistants tried to push her back on. Then she flipped over and fell off the other side, suspiciously gracefully. I'm beginning to think they usually have a put-on gimmick to make it look like something messed up.

Cooking

I got together with an old friend from HSF this weekend who wound up going to an SSW program in another city. It's been over a year, but it didn't feel so dramatic when he showed up, as if we'd seen each other just the other day. We went out for lunch at a Thai-Vietnamese restaurant just across the street from the school which I'd never bothered to visit but had always wondered about. It had good portions for the price. Probably people more refined would criticize it but it was good enough for me.

I've been doing a lot of cooking at home. I didn't do much of it in residence as I was only allowed to have a microwave (or a closed-element cooking utensil, but I didn't have anything better handy) and then last year because I... avoided using the kitchen area as much as I could (you can interpret that however you want).

Been making a lot of stirfry. Last one was rice with beans, zucchini, onion, cauliflower, mushrooms, and carrots with teriyaki and sriracha sauce. Kind of just remembered how the stirfry line at my school cafeteria did it and tried to replicate based on memory. First one had beef instead of beans and honey garlic instead of steriyaki, with a frozen vegetable pack instead of individually bought vegetables.

In Mali, I lost 30 pounds by eating rice constantly. In Chisasibi, I lost 30 on a vegetarian diet, so I'm supplementing my protein source with beans. I'm not too clever about nutrition, so I just try to replicate what's worked for me in the past. Hey, everyone's body is different, so you have to experiment to find out what works best for you personally.

I can make pasta too. These are like, the two things I can cook. You know that episode of Spongebob, where they go to the past and the caveman versions of Spongebob and Patrick discover fire and suddenly try putting different things on it to see if it tastes good? That's how I feel right now.

I'm about to try scrambled eggs. I know I've done that in the past. Heck, I was in Katimavik. I had to cook for a household for a week at a time when I was the House Manager. I know I'm capable of this.

Voting, Interior Decorating, and Work

I guess I never mentioned that I did follow through on my decision to vote. It was less high-tech than I'd imagined it to be. I did it at a local elementary school gymnasium and there weren't too many people there. Me and my brother were the youngest people voting when we went in.

This weekend I bought an electric fan and a dish drying rack. Before this, we kind of just left our dishes on the counter to dry after we washed them. This house has been so minimally furnished since my old roommates moved out. The entire basement is completely bare. Our common area is the kitchen space, and the basement, which has the most open space, just has nothing.

Well, whatever. I'm not going to fill it. Anything I bring has to be transported by hand, since I've got no car.

I can't speak on any identifying characteristics of participants in my work, but I can speak on my involvement at EaF. So if you wonder why I speak sort of detachedly on the subject, that's the reason.

The first day of the summer program starts tomorrow. My training is finished as of last week.

Last week, I got to meet my Peer Leader. Each of us is matched up with someone who has been labeled with a developmental disability to act as a partner leader for a week. I also got informed on the list of participants that I will be working most closely with.

Sleep Patterns

Last week on my first day of training, I was so nervous that I didn't sleep a wink. Planned ahead, lay myself down at an appropriate time, and continued to lie sleeplessly in bed for eight hours. I haven't been that wound up in years.

Next day, I made up for it and accidentally slept in, missed my bus and had to call a cab. Really expensive. I got up to $30, and the cab driver stopped the meter. He said, "I won't charge you more than $30." I thanked him and he said "It's no problem, we're almost there." But then we drove for like, another ten minutes. Guy shaved like, $10 off my fare. Never experienced that. It miiight be because we talked about it being my second day of training at EAF and sleeping in because I couldn't sleep at all the first day, but who knows.

Fourth day, we had a shift dedicated to team-building which had a rigorous physical element (very humbling). When we got back, I was so exhausted I passed out. Woke up at 10:45 PM, thought it was 10:45 AM and panicked thinking I was almost two hours late. Ran downstairs and bumped into my roommate, saw all the windows were dark, realized my mistake and burst out laughing. Me and my roommate shared a good laugh, although she didn't know what we were laughing about until I collected myself enough to explain.

I got my EAF Staff T-shirts the other day. Feeling pretty good about them.

I finally got my Non-Violent Crisis Intervention certificate, although I got it on the same day I started my Safe Management training (which replaces NVCI). So I got my certificate the same day I started to earn its replacement (although NVCI is still valuable to other agencies). I got to be in the final group of NVCI in EAF and the first SM group.

Remember how I lost my Segu book (novel based on the region of Mali where my counterpart lives)? Well, I just found it wedged beneath my dresser. So happy!

I Choose Dign!ty

I spent about $100 on clothes today. I feel bad.

Because of the nature of my job, I'm going to be doing a lot of summer fun activities, and due to the fact that I've been working in factories over the summer previously, my wardrobe is equipped to deal with factory-safe work and only very occasional summer leisure. So today I bought two pairs of shorts, a swimsuit, three T-shirts, sandals, running shoes, a wide-brimmed hat, and six pairs of socks.

I have so many shoes now. I have dress shoes, casual dress shoes, running shoes, slippers, and sandals. Feels frivolous.

Last Thursday, I went on a walk initiated by Extend-a-Family called the "I Choose Dign!ty Rally" We started at the EaF office and went to City Hall. There were speeches, food, music and celebration. There was an emphasis on asking society to acknowledge people labeled with development disabilities as able and worthwhile members of our community, but any community that felt a need to voice their decision to choose dignity was invited.

Shout-out to the LGBTQ ,community who marched with us and organized a speech. A common problem is that people detach themselves from events associated with people labeled with developmental disabilities in fear that they will be associated with the label. But two years in a row, LGBTQ has marched side-by-side in this movement fearless of being labeled virtue association, and has organized speakers to speak on behalf of their community.

First Couple Days of Work

Well, I've done two days of work now. This week is all training. We've done some team building exercises, learned how to help someone in a wheelchair get in and out of a van, we've done some research practices, gone over paperwork, done some personality tests and done some conflict management training.

We did the Personality Dimensions test, which is a new version of True Colours, which I'd done three times in the past. The idea is that there are four dimensions of a person's personality, and different ones are more dominant than others.

The past three times, I've always been primarily green (intellectual) followed by blue (empathetic) followed by orange (adventurous) and then gold coming in last (organized). It was always really close between green and blue, but green always won. This time around, I got green and blue evenly. I was the only person to have an exact blend like that. I've been told this combination makes me the best possible person to have a conflict with.

I got to meet another roommate. There are currently four people including myself living in this house.

It's a weird feeling to be here. Yesterday I walked to the grocery store and I felt the heat of summer on me, and I looked around and saw the trees lush and green. I realized that, even though I'd made the walk many times, I'd never done it at this time of year. Everything around me was familiar, yet it was all new.

And I'm not a student at the moment, I'm living here as a working man, haha. It just feels different.

I'm depending on my mom and brother to take care of the garden while I'm away, though. I put up some chicken wire so that should keep animals out (think a rabbit ate our cabbage). If I got a plant here, then I'd really be setting down roots (haha). I think I'm still a bit too nomadic for that.

It actually felt a bit bad leaving Well. It wasn't my type of work, but it was the best industrial atmosphere I'd ever been in and I liked the people there.

I wound up getting some work at that plastic factory before I left, so I felt better about rejecting it in favour of job searching before. Also, today I was offered an interview at Anishnabeg Outreach. I'm so flippin' employable now. Completely different game from when I'd just left high school.

Nine Sunflowers

Looks like I chose the right time to get a job. Ever since last Tuesday, I haven't been called in to work. The same day I heard back about the jobs, the agency actually offered me work at a plastic factory, which had the potential to develop into a day-by-day thing, similar to what I've been doing. I turned down the offer since I had job search type stuff to do, and at that time, a day off was rare. Felt like a fool when I got rejected for the front desk position but felt better about it when my efforts actually did land me work in my field.

We have a nozzle for our hose now. Before, we had an arrangement where the neighbours would have to ask us to turn the water on if they wanted to water their garden, but that's no longer a necessity.

Something ate two of our cabbages and four of our sunflowers last night, though, including my favourite sunflower.  Now we only have one non-mutant sunflower left, and nine sunflowers total. That does it, I'm only growing mutants next year.

I got my health card renewed. I thought it would be a huge pain, but it was actually one of the fastest experiences I've had with obtaining government documentation. Just showed up without an appointment, got put through almost immediately, only needed two pieces of ID and they accepted my student card, only one form needed to be filled out with very basic information which I already had completed, they took my photo and now if everything goes as planned, I'll have it in two to three weeks.

I'm glad they took my photo, unlike my driver's license, which is using a photo from when I was 19, even though I got it updated.

I'm thinking I'll try to get a credit card again. I was rejected when I tried to get it before I started going to college, but now I have nine months rent paid in my name and I'm a student. I have a friend who is with the same bank, and she managed to get one just using her status as a student. Now that you can order online with a debit card, and I'm building a credit rating without one, I really don't see why I would need one. But just because I've got the opportunity and it seems like something that people have nowadays.

Job Searching

Yesterday I got a call from 2ndchance while I was working, asking me to call them back about the job I'd applied for. I hoped that they wouldn't bother asking me to call back over a rejection. I was also worried, because I kind of wanted to wait and see if the Assistant Program Director position at Extend-a-Family would give me an offer, and I thought if 2ndchance wanted to speak to me directly, I'd have to make an on-the-spot decision.

Next day I figured I'd accept the offered position, called 2ndchance, and it turns out they wanted me to call back over a rejection. She gave me an overview of the strengths and weaknesses of my interview which I thought was kind of above and beyond until I remembered that she works in the helping professions for employment.

After I finished talking to her, I spoke to my friend who went for the Assistant Director position at EAF. She had gotten an offer the day before, whereas I had none. I figured they had probably done their rounds, speaking to those they had hired.

Didn't I say something to the effect of "I've been so successful for so long, I don't remember what failure feels like"? Well, I remembered then. It sucks.

At least... Well, I've been having some anxiety, because every time my life has been at an all-time low, something has come along to pull me out of it and reestablish the balance of positivity and negativity. So I've had this superstitious feeling that that doesn't just go one way, and if things have been going well for me this long, something pretty bad has to happen to restore balance. Having the negativity come in small waves of rejection seemed manageable.

But 2ndchance found me a nice job lead for Anishnabeg Outreach, which is an employment agency for Aboriginal services. I thought my not being native might stand in the way, but I was told it wouldn't. And besides, I know a regular European blend Canadian who works for Anishnabeg, anyway.

So I went downtown to apply there, and also to use a fax machine to send some information to EAF about doing direct support work in September. Everything goes fine, I'm coming back, and run into my friend who had been gunning for the 2ndchance job, too.

Remember how I said I'd feel terrible to snipe his opportunity? Well, I didn't have to feel that way, because regardless of my presence in the competition, neither of us got it.

I'm going to have to drop by 2ndchance and meet the person that beat us both.

So me and my friend are having a few drinks and pining over our failure. I get a call and it's EAF. I got the Summer Program Assistant Director job!

So, I said I'd finally remembered what failure feels like? I just forgot again!

But now something even worse has to happen to bring me out of this feeling of success, to restore balance between the positive and negative in my life.

Interviews

Last Monday my grandparents visited, but since I was doing a 10am-6pm work shift, I didn't get to see them for very long.

I've done my two interviews and I'm meeting up with someone tomorrow to discuss potential work. I should know the results for one position in the middle of next week, and for the other, late next week.

For the position I interviewed today, it was a group interview. I've never done one of those before. There were six of us, and one of them was a friend of mine. Apparently last year they took three people. If they do that again this year, disregarding how well I did inside the interview, numerically I've got a 50% chance.

I don't like to talk in-detail on public media about how an interview went because... well... if they Google my name, they could be reading this and then my blog might become influential in a potential decision... and I feel like I want to leave it at the interview process.

But I'll at least say that the interviews seemed to go fine.

I got to meet my new roommates. And we've got someone else moving in tomorrow. They're all here only for the summer, though.

As of next week, minimum wage is being increased to $11, which means that my pay at Well goes up fifty cents. But because I was making twenty five cents over minimum before, I'm going from being a scratch above minimum to minimum. So it's kind of good and bad to me, I don't know how to feel. I worry that cost of living will go up as the minimum wage goes up.

I'm going to vote for the first time this year. Now that my future career is dependent largely on government funding, I kind of have to support the people who don't want to eliminate jobs in my field. I finally have a team, Team Social Work.

I used to fit the bill of a blue color youth who didn't vote. I guess people who have had little influence don't feel the value of their influence.

This House

For the camp counselor position, I will be competing with at least one friend, and maybe three more. It's a weird feeling, competing directly with my peers.

I wonder if the girls chose the basement apartments, or if they were assigned them. They're the smallest, so I hope they at least don't have to pay as much.

I'll have to be in Kitchener next Thursday for my interview, and I'll have to stay overnight because it goes to eight. I don't know if I should ring the doorbell and introduce myself to my roommates, or if I should just walk in. It would be weird ringing the doorbell at the place that I've lived for eight months, but I don't want to spook anyone.

This house was only a three bedroom house, but my landlord changed it into a seven-bedroom by renovating it. For example, he built a wall through a dining room. Bam. Two bedrooms. I think my room is a legit bedroom, though.

Something that just occurred to me... Who's taking care of the garden?! We have a pretty sweet flower bed out front, but I didn't have anything to do with it, and certainly my old roommates didn't have any interest in gardening... It was there last year, too, though.

New Roommates

I'm in Kitchener this weekend because a friend of mine is having a Stag & Doe. I went back to my house and noticed a few subtle changes. I was expecting some because my landlord was giving it a makeover, but as I looked around, I noticed there were shoes I didn't remember and food in the fridge I didn't remember. Now, my ex-roommates left some stuff behind, so at first I chalked it up to that, but as I looked around, I noticed some different themes in the new housewear.

I shouted out my presence with no response, and I knocked on all the room doors. Three were open and three were locked. I got no response.

I deduced that someone else is living here, and from the shoe and food selection, I determined that they were:
1) East Indian
2) Female
3) Probably vegetarian

Got sick of the suspense and contacted my landlord. He said there are two girls living in the basement.

Wonder if I'll be living in a girl house this year. My previous setup was pretty testosterone-fueled (five guys and two girls)

I think being in an all-female program is giving me a bit of an affectation. Last week, I actually turned down a work shift because I said I needed to get a Greyhound ticket, I needed to make sure my place in Kitchener had a clothing selection, and I needed to buy shoes.

I slotted almost an entire day to shoe shopping.

I came to my senses, called the agency, and asked if they still had the shift, which they did. I told the guys at work and they were all like "But you already have shoes" and I was like "Yeah, but they're not presentable. They're not suitable for a social occasion."

Even though I took the shift, I still managed to buy shoes today. I knew my size and the style I wanted, but when I got there, I wound up trying on all the shoes in my size and then I bought a different pair. And I bought a pair of slippers.

Maybe it's because I've been eating so much soy and tofu lately. I started looking after my health a bit, and I'm not very clever when it comes to understanding the human body, but I know I've managed to drop thirty pounds twice in the past. Once in Katimavik and once in CWY, so I can at least follow the patterns that helped me then. In Katimavik, my poor attempt at trying vegetarianism left me malnourished but still taught me that meat stays in your system, so I've been limiting my intake of it, and I've found that tofu is both cheap and versatile. There's a stigma against it in the "macho man" community (which I belong to) because it gives you estrogen (supposedly). But I was all "Whatever, I'm a testosterone tank, a little estrogen would probably be good for me".

Well, two weeks later and I'm shoe shopping.

That was probably a nutritionally ill-informed and sexist rant.

I just got called back from Extend-a-Family for an interview to be a camp counselor. It would be next Thursday and I have an interview to be a front desk person at 2ndchance next Wednesday. I won't be able to work Wednesday, Thursday or Friday next week (I'll have to stay overnight in Kitchener on Thursday since the interview is 5-8) because I'll be too busy interviewing.

For the front desk job, one of my closer friends is going for it. And because of some circumstances I'm not willing to elaborate on over public media, I would feel just awful to snipe his opportunity. But I have to go for it, because in the end, all us SSW friends will be competing for work, and it would be so condescending for me to act like he couldn't compete with me, and what if I bow out, and then he doesn't get it? I have to still go for it with everything I've got.

I'm wearing red to the interview, and he's wearing blue. I said red speaks to ambition, motivation, energy, and assertion. He said that blue is calming, soothing, gentle, and approachable. He says blue is best for social services, I say red works best no matter what field you're in.

Oh, funny thing. I'm probably a little bit colour blind. I confuse some of the lighter shades of red and brown. All my life, I would argue with people over if certain shades were red or brown, and I would be contested hotly and unanimously. Only when talking it over recently though, did it really come together that I'm literally just a teense colour blind. I looked up if it was possible to be partially colour blind, and it is very, very possible.

It's not a big deal. Just a few shades in the "reddish brown" territory, but it's an interesting tidbit to learn about myself, having lived with it so long and only realizing it now.