Photo Time

Alright, so I got home the night of the 22nd. I still haven't made my final review of my Malian experience for Migrating Gryphon or the newsletter. I've published 94 photos to Facebook. This isn't really a photo-focused site, so I haven't published very many here, but to tide you guys over until I can get a full summary out, and to give the people who aren't on FB a taste of my experience visually, I've posted eight pics here: http://gryphonsgallery.blogspot.com/

Can't procrastinate firing this blog up again, since two people claimed they're going to read me from now on, and I've gotta hook 'em quick if that's the case.

Au Revoir,

Well, this'll be my last regular post. I'll be copy/pasting my email newsletters into my Migrating Gryphon account, found on my profile, if you're interested in keeping up-to-date that way, although since my two regular readers here are also on the email newsletter... Well, it's still a good way for me to keep track of my information.

I managed to salvage $900. Not bad for someone who lost their entire bank account, and in the course of a day, hey? It's called not putting all your eggs in one basket, although really, a bank should be a pretty reliable basket. But at least I'm not going into the program broke.

I'm taking a train tomorrow, around 6:30 AM, transferring once in Toronto, and then going to Dorval, Quebec.

I still don't have my requisites for the program complete. They haven't processed my Criminal Record Check yet, because last week happened to be St. John Baptiste. The program starts tomorrow! Why did everything happen so it would all be stretched to this fine line?!

I'm crazy nervous, I don't mind telling you. There's something wrong with my spirit. Usually, I'm so nervous about living an ordinary life, of living stagnantly, not making progress, of not putting down memory bench-posts regularly. Usually I'm obsessed with memory-manipulation to make my lifespan feel longer, usually, I'm hyper-competitive, and if I'm not doing something cool, I feel like I'm falling behind those of my generation.

But I don't have any of that adventure, that spark, that competitive fight in me right now. You can see it in my behaviour toward this blog. I invented it as a means of making sure I had one important thing to say every day, to motivate me to be active, and to manipulate my memory to make time slower. Lately I haven't been updating nearly so much... Honestly, about one-third of the amount I used to... And do you know why? Because lately I just want to hide under my covers, play video games, not think about them, and just... freeze.

The last thing I felt really competitive and compassionate about was Karate, but after I got my Orange Belt, I had met my goal, and even that passion petered out.

I'm terrified of this trip. I was terrified when I got the message, and I was terrified when I accepted.

I feel guilty, too. When I did Katimavik... Ooh, deja vu... I think I've said this before. Sorry. But, when I did Katimavik, I was directionless, unemployable, and I was going through a certain kind of crisis. Coming back, I was employable, I gained direction, and I'd gotten over my crisis.

Now I'm putting off my education to go be random in Africa, because I felt entitled to do this trip when I was given the opportunity, but was denied due to life circumstances the last time around.

The past couple weeks, I've had something I'd wanted to say, but didn't want to in case it hurt my conviction...

...I don't want to go.

Don't get me wrong... I'm going to go, and I'm going to learn to love it, because, strip away my adventure, spark, enthusiasm, competitive spirit, and love for gaining new stories, what have you left? Stubbornness, pride, and courage. Not the sweetest roster, but if they can get the job done, what have I to say? I've gone through so much to get here... And so many people have invested themselves in me... It's like Katimavik. I can't back down now.

In Katimavik, I had a period like this. But it was the first three days after I started the program, not the last two weeks before I left.

I keep thinking things like... Electronics screw up around me... There's a scientific theory about electromagnetic frequencies that come out of humans... How some people's are a little out of whack and it messes with things... What if I'm that way, and I wind up accidentally mind-boogying the plane, and I crash the plane into the sea and we all die?! Or... what if I can't take Mali's climate, and I panic, lose my mind, have a heart attack, there are no doctors, and I die?! Or what if the Large Hadron Collider loses control of it's sustained antimatter, creates a black hole, and I die?! I don't want to die while I'm away!!!!

And there's no backing out of CWY. The application system was built to eliminate those who would back out even before they start. Every candidate is relying on their counterpart to stick it through, because this is done in a system of pairs. And good luck dropping out when there's no electricity or mode of communication.

Anyway... Sorry to leave on such a downer... You guys get to see the dark underbelly of my psychology... The "real" me. I guarantee you, all the newsletter posts are gonna be sugar and gumdrops about me having the time of my life... and I won't let my doubt show. Oh well, it's best to leave on this note. It's normal to feel fear, but feeling fear and allowing yourself to be controlled by it are two very different things. Hopefully, I'll look back on this when I come back and realize what a right decision I had made.

I Hate Banks

Remember how I was changing bank accounts? Well, recently, I checked my online account to see if it had happened, and it did. I went to get my train ticket today, used debit, and it didn't work. I went to get cash, tried to take out $100, and found that my account only had $60. I checked my online account again, and it said that I only had $20 (I took out $40 to pay for the train ticket... cheaper than I expected).

I thought maybe it was identity theft, but I checked my transaction history, and it was accurate... but only if you factor out the transferred money from my other account ever having been there. Also, since I don't have a credit card, and I still have my debit card... It seems like identity theft would be hard.

I went to talk to my bank, and the guy said it takes 4-6 weeks for a money transferal between accounts, and it's only been around 4 weeks right now. He says I probably confused the money in the two separate accounts. I'd buy that, except this has happened twice...

First time was after the vaccinations. I'd checked my online account, and it had $1500 in it. Tried to use debit and was denied. Went back, found it said $150. Thought I must have missed a digit, since I was expecting $1500 and the amounts look similar despite being fairly different. When I checked the second time, to see if the money had transferred, I gave it a good, hard, thorough look, because I knew I'd already mis-seen it once. Then I called my mom over to give me a second oppinion on the amount before my eyes. She confirmed it.

So... I don't know what's going on. It's a little more distressing this time around, because last time, I tried to, and succeeded in, using my old account. Meaning the money was still around somewhere. Tried that trick this time, and it turns out, that account has been deleted.

So it really feels like $1500 just disappeared.

I hate banks, and I hate money. All they've ever done is cause me stress and hurt feelings. I know it's all necessary, but I can't say holding a handful of cash gives me the same buzz it seems to give others. I'm a good example of how money can slip through your fingers, and how unrewarding the experience can be. And I'm not bad with my money. I always try to save... But someone always steals it. You've heard... at least two stories regarding this. Mom's Disability and then this. But it's more extensive than that, and I don't feel like elaborating.

On the plus side, as I said above, the ticket was way cheaper, and I could still afford it. Instead of the $283 CWY predicted, it was only $88! That's... significant. I don't think CWY will give me the same reimbursement, though, since they're asking for receipts, but at least it meant my plans weren't thrown for a loop.

I went to my brother's achievement ceremony. It was a partial graduation ceremony, but because he goes to an alternative school, and his class is small, it might've been too short a ceremony if they'd only celebrated the two people graduating. It was pretty good. My brother got a certificate, he got a couple shout-outs during the ceremony, I got to meet all his friends, and some people he's told stories about.

Denying Donation-Collectors

I'm posting this from the library computer. Not because our computer is down, which is usually the reason, but because it's UP. We have two computers... A laptop and a desktop, and usually, only one of them is up at a time. The desktop keeps breaking down, although I'd get yelled at for phrasing it that way, and the laptop has issues with it's charge cable, or whatever you call it.

Yeah, so, there's a lot of features that the desktop has, but the laptop doesn't. We don't get Internet access for both computers at the same time, either. So Internet access has been a bit scarce of late.

The library upgraded the Internet access length from 45 minutes to an hour, though, looks like.

I finally got a copy of my Criminal Record Check. It was done on June 20, but it got stuck in the mail, because of Canada Post going postal on me. I went personally to the police station, explained my situation, and they straight-up gave me a copy right then and there. Of course, that leaves me with the problem of getting that copy to them. I sent an email asking if it was alright for me to just scan a copy to them, and they said that it was.

So my 13-box travel preparation checklist has essentially been completed.

Saying that you're spending six months volunteering for overseas issues, with three months in a West African village of 750 is just about the best excuse you can give to counter those guys on the street, who jump you, trying to get signatures to donate for their campaign. It's like "So you're willing to be paid only $10 an hour to get signatures from people to donate for overseas issues? I'm oing to be paid $2 a day to volunteer personally in a developing society. TRUMP! Both your cause, and your dedication. Yes, you may shake my hand."

I used to walk away from those people feeling dirty and guilty. I think I've blogged about this before, but I'm a real chump when it comes to these volunteer organizations. I avoid them, but if they catch me, and say, "excuse me, sir. Do you have two minutes to spare to talk to me?" I always say yes. And then I'll probably go through the prepratory stage, with no intention of following up. So I still burn them, but I don't have to do it to their face. Yes, I know that's worse...

Vaccinations

I got my vaccinations! I got ALL my vaccinations. Remember that list huge they sent me, but that only required Yellow Fever? Well, turns out I already had a couple of those still in solid effect. After consultation and a description of where I was going, the immunization people decided it would be wisest to put me through the others, too. Cost wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Because of the cost of Yellow Fever, I thought I'd be paying close to $1000. But Yellow Fever turned out to be the most expensive, so I wound up paying under $500.

I'm supposed to pick up some anti-Malaria pills and I have a prescription for an anti-diarrhea drink that acts like a shot, so I guess I still have a few more expenses.

They told me that my left arm would be sore and heavy, like someone punched me really hard, for awhile. And it's true. Also, apparently I've been really quiet and slow. My family says it's like someone turned the volume down on me, and put me in slow-motion. I was talking to someone on the phone, and they said asked me if I had a cold, because my voice sounded raspy. This is weird, because I don't FEEL too different.

They wanted me to bring my immunization record to the consultation. That was weird, because they work at the place that has those records. I tried calling the people in charge of them, but I only ever got the answering machine. I left one message and then called daily, but never got a response. Fortunately, I remembered that they emailed me my records when I had to get them for Katimavik. So I looked them up and printed them out. They were like, two years old, but at least I had something I could hand them and say "I haven't had any vaccinations since", which was a lot better than nothing. When I got there, she said "Oh, you brought them! Thanks! Wait, I have a copy right here. You keep that." A lot of wasted anxiety over nothing. Oh, well.

The travel-person got in touch with me. Before, it was like, "Organize it yourself. Meet us at the airport, but you can't travel by plane."

Well, now they're funding my trip, have come up with a good schedule to travel by, they're fully reimbursing me, they've taught me how to navigate between the train station and the airport, and they've told me where exactly in the airport I have to go, and what to recognize them by.

Just waiting on my Criminal Record Check now. Just the other day, I got my driver's license with updated address. Since I ordered both things on the same day, if it took each of them a comparable amount of time to reach me, that's a good sign.

On my 13-point check-off CWY requirement list, there's only one left unchecked now. Although, there's really two steps, since they've suggested a method of travel, but I still have to buy the ticket.

I saw a Katimavik van the other day. One in GUELPH! It was driving by, so I didn't get a chance to approach. There wasn't a group in it, just a lot of furniture. I wonder if Guelph is getting it's own group? Or maybe stuff is just cheaper in Guelph than wherever they're going. I looked up "Katimavik Guelph" online, and what I got was a blog from a person whose group did a day trip excursion to Guelph. That's seems weird to me, but I know everyone, everywhere had the attitude that they were surprised anyone would travel to their hometown. Grass is always greener on the other side, I guess. There was also an article from our newspaper on two participants who were native to Guelph.

Cats Cats Cats

One of the things I really enjoy about these new animals is, I didn't name them. Seems like I've wound up making the final call for too many of our pet names. I've made such wise decisions as to name our first rat "Pretty", our gerbil "Scamper" our hamster "Furry", our cat "Blackavar" and our rabbit "Moss". The first three were descriptive, but the last two are references. "Blackavar" was a rabbit from the book Watership Down. That's right. We owned a rabbit and a cat, and I named the cat after a rabbit. Blackavar was my favourite rabbit from that book, but his personality was about directly the opposite from our cat. His alternate name propositions were "Charcoal" and "Sootfoot". As for our rabbit, Moss. If you ask me, I'll tell you it's because we rescued him from a neglectful situation, and that the toughest plant that can grow on anything is moss. Naming him after a plant is a tradition carried through our pet names, keeping with the Watership Down theme. It was just a matter of choosing the plant.

...Actually, that's what I'll tell you I'd tell you, but I'll most likely say "I dunno" because I know my alibi is BS. Truth be told, he's named after an unfortunate event in my life. An unfortunate event that was unfortunate when I chose that name for him. So, why did I name him that? I don't know. Seemed right at the time. Why do people keep taking my name ideas? I don't know that, either.

Whenever I tell people my rabbit's name, they say, "Like Kate Moss?" and I say "Who's Kate Moss?" I seriously don't know. I think she's a model. Maybe I should Google her sometime.

I don't think I have as much of a cat fixation as the rest of the rest in my family. I mean, if you put a cat in front of me, I'm going to love it. But if there isn't a cat in front of me, I don't think, "Oh no, I need a cat in front of me!"

I'm probably just in denial. In my group, one of the guys was complaining that girls drop conversation to pet an animal. He warned me never to trust a girl who likes animals. Later on, we ran across a cat, and I beckoned to it. When he frustratedly told me to "come on", I told him, "Fuck you, I want to pet the kitty". Similarly, when my group came across a cat, it would generally be all the girls plus Gryphon that paid attention.

My one trait that breached language barrier and helped me find common ground with those who didn't speak English was my attention to neighborhood cats, too.

So I guess all that tough-guy talk about being less cat-focused than the rest of my family was kind of unjustified, thinking back on it.

More Cats

The cats are getting along fine. When we first introduced our current cat, Blackavar, to our now deceased cat, Penny, Penny flipped out and attacked. I was shocked, as I'd never seen her react that way before. When we had that little saga with the damaged homeless kitten, the two cats had a similar disagreement. There's a neighborhood stray that cruises by and tries to fight with Blackavar through the window. I assumed it was natural instinct for cats to initially get into turf wars, no matter how unimposing the other cat seemed, but apparently, this isn't the case for all of them. These new guys must have very little fight in them, and Blackavar can sense that. After letting them sniff at each other for a day, we formally introduced them, with very little turbulence. We let them interact freely now, but only while supervised. They get along great with the rabbit, too, strangely.

Thor's kind of surly and introverted around other cats. He's real friendly around humans and the rabbit, but if Blackavar approaches, he hisses. Strangely enough, he hisses at Luna, too. He doesn't attack, but he hides under the bed a lot.

I know Luna's originally from the humane society, I know she was introduced to Thor to keep him company, and I know Luna's under a year old. This leads me to believe that, after the old owners lost Thor's companion and no longer had a schedule to keep him company, they got him Luna to be his new companion. But Thor and Luna didn't hit it off, so they adopted them both away. This means that, even though we got them as a twofer, Thor is probably still on the tail end of the introductory stage.

So, I figured out why I assumed CWY would buy my ticket. It's their custom... they just decided not to with me. This is what it says under travel:

"Canada World Youth will cover all of your transportation costs during the program, including from your departure point to the designated meeting point at the beginning of your exchange. However, you will need to cover costs from your home to the departure point.

Departure point: Your departure point will most likely be the bus station, train station or airport closest to your home. The transportation from your home to your departure point will not be reimbursed."

But when I got my own travel info:

"IMPORTANT: You are asked to organize your own transportation from your departure point to your meeting point (by bus, train or car). You will receive a partial reimbursement."

The meeting point is in Montreal Trudeau Airport. I don't so much mind having to pay my own way, but I don't exactly know when or where I'm supposed to meet them. It feels like this thing is getting kicked off with a survival test. There's no explanation for why I have to do this... They just backed down on what they said. If I can't trust them for this, why should I trust them for anything else? I mean, this time around I'm okay, but I won't be if they keep pulling stunts like this. Man, I'm pissed.

All my $28000 is in, at least. Turns out, my Criminal Record check passed the three week mark a couple days ago.

New Cats

We got two new cats. We didn't get them from the humane society... That's where they were originally from, but we got them from a couple who were looking for a new owner, since they had recently had a child, and were concerned that they weren't able to give them enough attention. We were originally only looking for one, but this seemed really opportune. During my lifetime, I think we've only had cats in pairs. They've been single during periods after their partner's death, but two has been our comfort zone. The new cat was, from my perspective, supposed to be my replacement, and to fill the void in my family's hearts while I'm gone, although I'm sure that's needlessly narcissistic.

We got a one-year-old black tabby female named Luna, and a six-year-old fluffy black male named Thor. Both are fixed, microchipped, and all that.

They're both super-mellow. We're keeping them separate from our old cat for now, so they can sniff at each other from under the door and get acquainted a bit before formal introductions. Nobody's acted hostilely. We've already introduced them to our rabbit with no issues.

Turns out, CWY expects me to organize my own transportation to our meeting point. Our meeting point is in Montreal... Why'd they talk about covering travel expenses, and asking me where the nearest airport from me was, using a drop-down menu, if they were going to completely disregard it? Oh, well.

Did I post about going to get my criminal record check? I'll need to check the archives, and see if I can get a date. They said it would be two to three weeks, but I still haven't got it, and I'm pretty sure it's well over. Same with my driver's license with the updated address. There's a postal strike over here, and it's come at a really inopportune time. Even when I get my check, I still have to send it into them, and it's already overdue. If I had to reorder, I'd be done. Not enough time.

Here's the link to that Personal Support Worker course I was interested in taking, if you're interested: http://www.conestogac.on.ca/fulltime/program.jsp?SchoolID=3&ProgramCode=1165&v=1101&p=o

Reviews Blog and Humane Society

I just added four reviews to my reviews blog. I probably won't link them, because you probably won't read them. That's not me having a cynical view of how many people read my reviews, it's only because, if you're a relatively longstanding reader, you've probably already read them. I know I've said this before, but there have been some things that I've written on this blog that could count as reviews, but which I just sort of didn't realize at the time. I went back hunting for Yume Nikki and Plants vs. Zombies, picked up My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, and curiously decided my Twitter rant counted as a review.

So I've at least posted in both of my branch blogs since coming back. I'm happy.

It was weird reading over all that stuff I'd written It was better than I thought. I always think my newer content is worse than my old content in terms of writing quality... and I think my old stuff is factually or ideologically bad, but when I look over them, I tend to find them positive surprises and consistent quality.

I also changed the name of my Katima-Gryphon blog to The Migrating Gryphon and changed the subject from "A blog on my experiences in Katimavik" to "A blog on my experiences in Katimavik and Canada World Youth". I'll only be able to update it when I'm in Quebec, though, and then I'll have to use one of those screwy French keyboards that gimps English punctuation. My Malian placement has no electricity.

Knowing me, I'll probably keep a written journal, and mean to copy the entries onto my blog, but I'll be too lazy after I come back, and just shelve it.

We're looking into getting another cat. We visited the humane society recently... It was really depressing. I can sort of understand the necessity of having one, I guess... But no matter what rationale you put for the reasons on why they do the things they do, I'm never going to feel warm and fuzzy inside by the presence of so much imprisonment, castration and murder.

And even if you're there to rescue one... You come out feeling worse than otherwise, because you weren't able to rescue them all.

I'm going to see a number of old friends tomorrow, for a farewell get-together.

OD'd on Caffeine

Hey guys, I had a caffeine overdose. I... didn't know that could happen. But it can, it did, and it was bad. I got dizzy, my heart started racing, I started yelling, and even partially collapsed. This happened in public, too.

And no, I'm not saying “caffeine” as a code word for a less legal substance. It was seriously just caffeine. And not even through those hyper-strong energy drink like Red Bull... Just coffee. I had three cups, but didn't realize each of them had the strength of three, so it was more like nine.

Coffee is the lamest thing to OD on... It's so innocent... It's like ODing on fresh air!

I got better, though. Got to a quieter place, drank lots of water, found some shade...

I've got this feeling right now, like there's a billiards ball in my chest where my heart should be. When I'm highly stressed or feeling panicky, I get this sensation. It's just anxiety, though... Not anything new for me.

First time I slept deeply after the panic, I had a very vivid dream...

There was a party at our place, and Mr. T was there. He'd taught me Karate for a month and acted as judge in a competition I'd performed in. I didn't know if he'd remember me, but he did, and we really hit it off.

Then I went downstairs and took off all my clothes for no reason, and then realized that that floor was full of open windows and I was standing in front of one which had Mr. T's group outside of it. I thought they might not have seen me, but that guy from the "punching people before they eat" skit on Saturday Night Live or Mad TV made eye contact with me, smiled and nodded.

I quickly dressed and told Mom and my brother about this embarrassing occasion, but there were people listening everywhere. So, to avoid further embarrassment, I started changing key words in my story to "pig", which kind of made sense because there were pigs everywhere for some reason.

Then my Grandpa, who'd been listening in, said that he "didn't have a problem with pigs". I said "Yeah?" and he said "No, the problem I have is with this guy Nick and how he treats you."

Then I recalled that I had told my grandpa a fake story earlier to cover another embarrassing story. I had said the first lie to jump into my head, which was that a guy named Nick would beat me up and tell me what to do frequently.

When I woke up, there was a huge lightning storm... There was so much lightning it wasn't even dark out, though it was night. It knocked the light out in the city all night long.

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

Hey, so have you heard of the latest craze among guys in my age bracket? A show by the name of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. I don't want to bother getting making an Imageshack account and uploading a picture right now, so just trust me... it's exactly what it sounds like. Here, I'll post a link: http://www.avclub.com/articles/my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic,55168/

Wait. That links to another blog, with a different review. No, don't read that one. Read this one. Look at the picture that he bothered to upload, and then come back.

For emphasis, the main cast includes characters with the following names: Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Fluttershy. And it's really mainstream. If you talk to any young adult male about it, you're expected to know.

I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, it's nice to see guys during their machismo-focus years learning to value qualities which are, but should not be, considered exclusive merits of the female gender... Qualities like honesty, sharing, kindness, loyalty, friendship etc. I was way ahead of these guys on watching girly kids' shows, too. I started up as soon as it looked ironic (16).

But that's the thing... All these guys like this show unironically. For instance, I knew these two guys who got into a pretty bad tussle over something... They both walked away feeling sore. One of the guys left and watched some My Little Pony to cool down. Then he remembered the value of his friendship, gained perspective on his friends feelings, and came back to sort things out productively. My Little Pony actually helped these guys overcome an actual, real-world conflict that would have likely otherwise been damaging.

And that's great. If My Little Pony helps make this a world where people can reach out and understand each other better, who am I to complain?

In fact, it's not so surprising that it would be quality... It was created by the makers of Powerpuff Girls and Fosters Home for Imaginary Friends, both little kids shows with a surprising amount of appeal.

But, after watching two episodes, I have to say, I think both PPG and Fosters are vastly superior. It's not that My Little Pony is bad... It's just really, really average. It is everything you'd expect of a show that preaches basic morals to little girls. I don't see the appeal at all.

And I want to... I want to see the ground-breaking series that turned a bunch of hard manly-men to seriously consider the values of more a more sensitive and considerate lifestyle. But whatever they see in it, it just flies over my head.

I should have probably posted this in my reviews blog, but I won't.

Oh, I'm going to be in Toronto this weekend, and probably won't be able to update.

6-Months French Immersion

I got a message from my PL the other day. She sent it entirely in French, with a small English explanation, saying that she hoped we were resourceful enough to find a way of translating it, either through someone with strong enough French, or through French/English dictionaries. So I copy/pasted it into Google Translate, and this is what I found out.

La Pocatier uses "very little" English, and in Karaj (that's how it's pronounced and an acceptable spelling, it seems) English is "almost nonexistent". All activities and events will be in French.

So it's six months of French immersion for me. In Katimavik, the French participants always complained that us English couldn't understand the psychological barrier of always holding conversation in a language you didn't think in, or of being completely isolated in it. Even when we reached our French placement, it was in Cree Nation, with English as primary, Cree secondary, and French... tertiary? The most us English ever had to complain about was learning to communicate with people who had English as a second language, through English. Now that I'm going into a program with French as the dominant language, and I'm less prepared for it than any of the French participants that I knew,I'll be sure to let them know if their complaints were justified.

My PL also seems to have crazy credentials. She's dealt with people a lot tougher than... me, at least. And from what I've found out about the other participants, and from what I'd expect of students in a program like this, them, too. She's been to a lot of places, and extensively. And she'll be traveling with us.

French is the official language of Mali, but the "language of trade" is Bambara, and MyFile changed my program language to French/Bambara.

I'm starting a new bank account. I hate banking. I don't get it, and people get irritating when they talk about it. When I first started out, the person who was teaching me about banking told me to get an account at some trendy new banking... thing. Then a lot of people got irritated at me, and someone else got me to start an account somewhere else, but that place also got people angry. Every time it starts getting people angry, then the people who reacted positively at first are all like, "It was a bad idea and I always knew it was!" No, you didn't! And then, when you ask why it's a bad idea, or what's bothering people,they start using words I don't understand, and then they start talking about completely random things.

And every time I start somewhere new, there's some complication, and they grill me like a job interview, and everything is just very uncomfortable.

So I'm starting one at the most mainstream bank I can find, and maybe everyone can shut up.

I forgot to say yesterday, Yellow Belt (3rd rank) is, along with Brown (8th rank) the Belt with the highest dropout rate. So getting past Yellow is kind of a big deal. I'm not considered a beginner anymore. I'm now intermediate, and I'm qualified to spar.

1st Degree Black Belt is though, I guess, another one of the belts with the highest dropout rate, if you can count it. Hitting Black Belt is such a goal for everyone that, once they get it, they might say they're going for their 2nd degree, but most people don't feel the motivation to work so hard for something that doesn't get them a new belt.

Got My Orange Belt

I got my Orange Belt! Remember my description of the last grading? All frowns and intensity and pain? And that I was the only white belt grading in a group of all adults going for advanced ranks? Well, this time it was a huge group, with lots of kids. I was one in four Yellows, three of us adults. The two other adult Yellows were the only adults grading this time around.

So, because of that, the super-tough attitude of the last grading didn't come through so much. No, "Who feels like more push-ups?!" "Me sir!" "I can't hear you!" "ME SIR!". Apparently they don't do that so much with kids. I even got to see some kids do that advanced kata that, in the last grading, included a blackbelt beating the tar out of you while you had to keep dancing. It didn't come across as a real beat-down this time around. It was more like, applying pressure to a shoulder here to test their balance, pushing on their fist as it extended to test strength... If that had been the first demonstration of the kata I'd seen, I wouldn't have called it a beat-down... I would have called it a series of technique checks.

But even with the lighter attitude, the endurance testing wasn't any easier. It was slightly humiliating, seeing some of those kids looking better than me during that testing. I broke a couple times on the slow push-up. Last time, I told you that I held a wall sit until my shaking knees shook the wall, and the shaking wall shook a picture frame, and it's clattering attracted the attention of blackbelts. No matter how long and painful, I've never broken on a wall sit. It'd be so dramatic and obvious, while, with a slow push-up, you break, and you're up again in a split second. Plus, you've got things to concentrate on and do, and that might trigger the collapse, whereas a wall sit is just holding one stance. But even so, I feel like I had a bit more lenience with myself this time than last time.

Last time, I thought there was a good chance I wouldn't get the belt if I screwed up, and everyone around me was so pro, I thought I needed to live up to their standard. This time around, even though I was concentrated on doing my best, with more people, and less judges, the focus taken off you, seeing others fail, receiving encouragement and knowing you're going to succeed... It kills that little edge you get from that gut-feeling of adrenalin.

I think I did well, though. At the end, when you go through, shaking hands and bowing with each judge, I got a lot of specific praise outside of the traditional "Congratulations". The guy who let me squeak through let me know ahead of time he'd be paying attention to the stance he almost held me back for. He let me know afterwards that I did way better than I had during striping. The head Sensei said this was my best grading yet, which I didn't honestly feel had too much impact as a complement, since I've only ever graded one time before. It still means I improved more Yellow-Orange than White-Yellow.

In the self-defense section, because there was an uneven number of students, they had me practice on a blackbelt judge. That means I perform twice as much, and I constantly attract the attention of at least one judge. That happened last time, too.

I got corrected once, and a judge caught my eye at one point and gestured a suggestion for one of my stances, but that wasn't too bad. Two advanced ranks needed to be talked through their katas at certain points, and one guy got pulled aside to be given advice on his performance.

On my way to the dojo, a muskrat charged me!It bounced out of the tall grass, ran at me, and then, when it was about two feet from me, it flipped sideways and disappeared into the grass. I guess something must have startled it, it ran out in a panic, ran into me, and booked it in a different direction. Or maybe it was a mother and it's young were nearby, so I just accidentally stepped too close and it tried to scare me off. I was so focused on Karate, I just registered it as a low strike and I automatically moved into my low block. But good luck blocking something that's a foot high! Would've ran right under my fist. It would have been better self-defense just to boot it.

Made an impression though, apparently, because that night I had a dream about a friendly, fuzzy, cute-looking creature biting me, turning into an eight-foot tall body builder, and charging me. I guess it symbolizes something cute and sweet-seeming suddenly gaining an intimidating and ferocious appearance, like it did in real life. Strangely, though, in my dream, a friend of mine kicked it in the back of the knee, causing it to stumble, and I swept it's legs over my shoulder and flipped it, making it tumble down a flight of stairs and be ultimately defeated. I then reached out to it with words and helped it overcome it's psychological problems which caused it to attack me (a raccoon tricked it into thinking something untrue about me), and it turned back from the bodybuilder into it's fuzzy woodland creature self.

Also, that creature wasn't a muskrat. It was a shrew. And the dream started with someone telling me that you can't trust shrews, and me telling them they were wrong. The moral of the dream seemed to be that you can trust shrews, but you need to have good communication.

Well, that doesn't sound so related to my muskrat anymore. Whatever.

Showing Up in Too Many Searches Nowadays...

Today, I did a little bit of research on Karadjé, and you know what I found out? If you Google, "Karadjé Canada World Youth" the third hit is my blog! Specifically, theGot My Green Stripe entry just prior to this! It's an obscure thing to search, but do you know who would? People in my group looking for info, same as me! Gaah! I hope no one from my group sees it, and blackmails me by threatening to tell Sensei of my underhanded dealings!

Otherwise, it looks like Karadjé only became a CWY placement last year, with only two groups having moved through it before me. Also, it only has a population of 750. These facts help explain why info on it is so difficult to dig up.

I haven't posted in my Reviews blog since coming back. I must have become less critical. That's no good. I just haven't been feeling it. I hope my brain didn't bust from doing that factory work.

I watched a movie in-theater a little while ago... I watched The Simpsons Movie... Watched another movie with a friend... I read Green Grass Running Water by Thomas King... I played Pokemon White... I haven't reviewed anything.

Plus, it's Spring... I have a photo gallery for Winter,Summer and Fall on my Photos blog... Only season left out is Spring... I'm not working, and I've got a digital camera... How lazy have I got?!

I want to copy/paste that stuff I said about Yume Nikki and Plants vs. Zombies. Those were basically reviews, but I did them because it was a slow news day and I still had enough integrity to try and post daily... And because of that, I neglected to appreciate them for what they were... Reviews, ripe for a far more needy blog. But this site doesn't have a convenient serch bar, and I'm kinda too lazy to look for that post manually.

Here's a cat and dolphin playing together:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rynvewVe21Y

Cat and barn owl being friends:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iqmba7npY8g

Two otters holding hands:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epUk3T2Kfno

Got My Green Stripe

I got my green stripe. I'll tell you how I got it, but I really hope Sensei never reads this. See, I went in to Open Practice, ready to beg for an illegal shot for the stripe, and saw that the only sensei there was the one that wasn't there to see me get my black stripe the day before. So I asked to test with him. I did, and he said that I should work on my shutos, but I'd get the stripe next Thursday. I told him next Thursday was Grading. He decided to let me practice a bit, come back, and try again. After he saw my second try at it, he said that if it were any other stripe, any other day, I wouldn't get it, but that he didn't want to hold me back another full month.

So basically, I wasn't eligible to test, and I failed it, but I got the stripe.

What. You think someone's going to notice my stripes and timeline don't quite sync up? We'll see about that.

For CWY, I think that they didn't have a clear idea of our exact locations at first, but then decided to put us down as Agricultural. This makes sense, because La Pocatier is a small town with little to it's name. Perfect farmland. Then, after some research, they found out there's nothing to farm in Karadjé, so they decided to make that rotation a different focus. This makes sense, because Karadjé is a tiny village with almost no information about it on the Internet at all, except that it's in the middle of the desert.

So I'll be farming for three months in Quebec, and I'll be doing something else in Mali, I think.

FML

Canada World Youth has an unfortunate slogan: Face My Limits. It's unfortunate because the acronym, FML, is shared with a more well-known web site named Fuck My Life. On that site, people post unfortunate instances of their lives, and people can vote on whether or not their anguish is valid. The site is popular enough that FML became a commonly recognized form of slang across the Internet. For instance:

"MyFile said they had my Criminal Record Check, but I just found out they don't, and now I can't get it in on time. FML."
"I went in to apply for my Criminal Record Check, but the address on my driver's license was wrong because my family moved when I was in Katimavik. FML."
"I need two stripes to change belt ranks in Karate, but I just found out you can't get more than one in a week, and because striping happens Thursdays and Fridays, and striping is on Thursday, I don't have another chance before grading. And even though I'm there for almost all of next month, I leave right before June's grading, meaning I'll have to wait 7 months to change rank. FML."

Okay, I got a bit too into that. Anyway, yeah, I had to get my address changed on my driver's license so that I could use it to apply for my Criminal Record Check. The reason was so they could verify my address. But when I went to get my driver's license changed, they just took my word for it. What's the point of using a piece of ID to verify your address if that piece of ID never verified your address? It's not like they took a copy of my driver's license or anything... They just filled out a form based on what was written on the license. Whether or not it was written on the license, the only source of information given to them were my words.

And Karate's driving me crazy. I'm going to try to pull some strings, but if I don't manage to, I've been set back 7 months.

It usually takes someone about 6 months to change rank, but because of how my time's been cut up, I spent about 3 months training before Katimavik, then spent 6 months in Katimavik, came back and trained 7 months, set back becaus eof Afternoon and rotating shifts, and now I might have 7 more. That's 23 months as a yellow belt. 24, actually, because it'll take me at least a month to reach grading once I come back.

Hey, one of my senseis was driving me home, and he started talking about the deeper values of studying Karate, in the terms of the principles of the sweatlodge, which I outlined in an email. Now, he didn't say anything about sweatlodges, but he did move into the topic by talking about the things I learned by doing a program like Katimavik, which fills in the holes that regular school leaves.

A bit much of a coincidence, eh? I think he probably read my email, even if he wasn't on the list.

I found out where I'm going in Mali. It's a place called Karadjé. There's almost no info on it online, except that it's a village, and it's smack-dab in the middle of the desert. Also, my program will be an Agricultural/Environmental splice, instead of just a solid Agricultural one. They just put this info down. When I first got placed, there was almost no info, and slowly, they've filled it out. I wonder if they kind of found out what we were doing on the fly. Placed me before there was a cemented placement.

Birth Certificate Surpisingly Convenient Arrival

Today my birth certificate arrived. This is a huge relief, since if it had taken the worst-case amount of time within their estimate, it would have fallen outside the deadline for getting it in. My Criminal Record Check is going to fall outside the deadline, but since that's only because CWY was slow in finding whether or not they had it, they're going to be cool with that.

I received a friend invite on Facebook, and a message from someone in my up-coming CWY group. He says he'll make a group for us so that we can all get to know each other, and that he'll be passing through Guelph a lot in the next month, so we'll probably get to see each other before the program starts.

I have to get my orange belt in Karate this month, or I won't be able to get it at all. I need two stripes: black and green. Before, you could get your black stripe on Mondays and Tuesdays. Now, you can only get any stripe on Thursdays and Fridays. Also, the Green stripe used to be free (it was for attendance). Now, you need to perform every kata up to where you are. The black stripe is the kata stripe, which you get for performing the katas you learned within your rank. This means that, for the black stripe, I need to perform my Yellow katas, and for my green, I have to perform White and Yellow. Green just went from the easiest stripe to the hardest.

Also, because gradings are on Thursdays, instead of having Monday and Tuesday to get my stripes for two weeks, I only have the Thursday and Friday the week prior.

This means that, by the old system, I would have four chances to get one stripe, whereas, by the new system, I have two chances to get two stripes. And since I failed black stripe in a surprising way last time, I'm not too confident about my chances this time around...

Grandparents Visiting

My grandparents were visiting me this past week. I know I didn't update during that time... I guess it's a little uninspiring to write when you know half of your audience (my grandma) is getting the live-action version. Not that the other half (my uncle) missed out on much. I kind of flubbed it. I was silent like a stone through most of the trip.

I guess it's hard to know what to talk about when you've already blogged all your good stories and opinions. Where do you catch up with from there? All I had were my underground stories. And even then... You know... Even if you've got a good, open relationship with your very realistic grandparents, if you haven't had a good heart-to-heart with them since what feels like a different life stage, you don't want to be leaping whole-heartedly into stuff like that in such a short span of time.

This feels weird. It's like I'm speaking directly to my grandmother through a third-person perspective.

Well, anyway, since you're not getting any backroom stories, I'll move on...

Yo... If I take that Personal Support Worker course once I get back, I'm going to be the only heterosexual male in class. I have no delusions about this. Oh well. If I get flak, I'll just tell them it's "Where all the chicks are" and they will have to immediately respect me. That's the loophole response you give anyone for pursuing an interest that falls outside your gender stereotype. Well, if you're a coward, that is.

Before, when I mentioned the course, I said it was a "degree" course. I meant "diploma". I know that in the States, there's no division between College and University, so I don't know if there's a division between degrees and diplomas. I'll explain anyway, although I'm not really an expert on the subject.

Colleges are easier to get into, easier to complete, often take a shorter time to graduate from, and are cheaper to attend. You generally get diplomas for graduating college, although there are a few exceptions. Universities are, conversely, more difficult and more expensive, and you get degrees there.

But I always confuse the words "diploma" and "degree". I think it's because you get a diploma for graduating high school. High school takes at least four years to complete and most post-secondary degree programs take four years or more. So I tend to think, to get another diploma, it would take the same amount of time as it took to get my last diploma.

Also, "diploma" is made of hard, strong sounds. Dip-Low-Ma. Degree floats softly and easily off your tongue... degree. You expect the stronger-sounding word to go with the harder-to-obtain credential.

Nikken PiMag

I got the remainder of the gear I'll need for CWY. I didn't have to get a lot. Just a couple pairs of pants, a canteen, and a sleeping bag. I hit up Value Village. Interestingly, the most expensive item by far was the pants. They went $10.00 apiece. The sleeping bag was $4.00, and I got two reusable water bottles, both priced at $2.00.

I got the more expensive sleeping bag, too. The other one was $3.00. And the water bottles were a bang for their buck, as they are... Nikken PiMag Ionic Filtration Water Bottles.

According to the bottle, which has both that full title and trivia printed directly on it, these bottles are proven technology used by international relief agencies, military units, and organized expeditions.

It eliminates or reduces up to 99.8% of the following:
-Unpleasant taste and odors, sediment and chlorine
-Toxic chemicals: trihalomethanes, PCB, TCE, detergents, pesticides (DDT), MtBE
-Harmful microscopic pathogens: cryptospordium, giardia
-Heavy metals: aluminum, asbestos, cadmiuym, chromium, copper, lead, mercury
-Radon-222

Then it goes on to say how it should be maintained and who it's been certified by.

It even has a manual that came along with it. In that, it details who it's targeted at, and why these people benefit, and it even gives a guide on how to demonstrate the effectivity of the bottle in front of a crowd as if it is a magic trick.

I looked it up online and someone sold one on eBay, the final bid being at $30.

I only took that bottle because it was the most practical one there. I didn't even realize what it was until I noticed the manual inside. Looks like they were being sold new, too.

Of course, if I have dangerous water, I'm not going to trust the Nikken PiMag alone to protect me... I mean, in all honesty, maybe it works, maybe it doesn't. If I accidentally drink poison and it protects me, that's great, but I'm not going to rely too heavily on it.

I got into a conversation with the clerk when I was buying it, even. Good thing I'd just finished reading the manual.

Balding

I'm glad of the reception I got in the comments section yesterday. I was worried people would call me an unemployed loser and tell me to stop being a drain on society. Well, not in so many words, but...

I guess that's just how I feel. It was pretty out-of-character for me to quit, but when you've got deadlines rushing you and you keep being denied because of all this free work you're doing... I believe I should benefit society, but it's supposed to be a mutual thing. I benefit society, and in return, society benefits me. That wasn't happening.

...

I think I'm BALDIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

IT'S THE END!!!! THE ENNNNNNNNNNNND!!!!!!!!

I'd like to say it was the stress of working those factory jobs, but I don't think it was. In Katimavik, when we were playing a game where we listed our favourite and least favourite features about ourselves, for my physique, I said "The fact I'm balding". And one of the clients for people with intellectual disabilities where I was working told me that I'm balding. Both those things happened in first rotation.

I remember that, when I graduated high school, I still had a full head of hair. In fact, I had a head of beautiful, flowing hair that fell to the small of my back.

So it was between graduating high school and starting Katimavik. I graduated high school in 2008 and attended Katimavik in 2010. That means it probably started in 2009.

When I was a little kid, my hair was light brown, almost blond. Then it darkened to almost black. Also, it used to be dead straight. Now it's pretty darn wavy. My hair's gone through a lot of transformations in life, but it looks like it's the end of the road...

I think I've spoken about this before, but now I've gotten self-conscious enough about it to wear a bandana to cover up my bald spot.

Hey, have you ever thought about why folding your arms is supposed to be intimidating? In the wild, a creature will try and make itself look larger to frighten away an enemy, but folding your arms is a way of making yourself look smaller. It's also a habit for introverted or insecure people, and it's not a good stance at all for combat. Weird.

CWY lost my criminal record check... I lost my birth certificate, and it turns out vaccinations cost like, $100 a pip.

On my MyFile on the CWY website, under Criminal Record Check, it says "We have received a copy of your criminal record check. Keep the original.", but it didn't have a check mark next to it on the check-off box like the rest of the things I've completed.

I submitted a criminal record check in 2010 when they first asked me to join as a replacement for someone who backed out. Because it was such short notice, I asked them to transfer my file from Katimavik, which they said was okay, since they work out of the same office. I wouldn't have assumed that that was still valid, except it said so directly on the site. Only because of my slight unease due to that little left-out detail did I contact them, and lo and behold, it's not there.

As for my birth certificate... That's maddening. I really thought I'd just go over to my filing cabinet and take it out. I was pretty sure it would be in my new cabinet, because I was pretty sure there must've been something else I'd used it for since then... It seems like one of the staples: Health Card, SIN, Birth Certificate... But it wasn't there so I looked through the old files from the cabinet I had before my family moved. Under "Important Documents" I found the perforated piece of paper that my birth certificate was originall in, but no certificate itself...

And as for the vaccinations, someone told me they were like $10 apiece, but I guess they missed a digit. I needed what, seven vaccinations? $700, I guess.

Quit My Job

So, I found out where my money's been going. Mom's Disability adjusts her cheque based on the earnings I make. They expected me to pool all my money into the family, and at $12 an hour, I can't exactly support a family of three. The reason it looked like I was making money at the beginning was because there's a two month gap before they start deducting. And after you stop working, there's a two month gap before they start charging. That means that it's really an illusion that I've saved almost any money. I have to give back what they'll take after I stop working.

I've still saved money, but it's more in the vein of $200 instead of $2000. Five months of work for almost nothing.

So I quit.

I don't like to do it. But right now, everything I've saved came out of my family's pocket, and I've got a lot of stuff to do this month. Most of my preparation deadline's for CWY are due this month, not next.

At the agency, they asked me to do another shift while they prepared my replacement. I hadn't told anyone there that I was leaving, and I knew I wouldn't have it in me to ask the supervisor to sign my paysheet at the end of the day. I wore one of my "Volunteer" shirts that day, and someone called me out on it. He said "You're working for free?" and I said "Yeah, I'm working for free!"

And it was true~ Why not. I've been working for free for five months.

All my workmates must've been baffled at what happened to me. Oh, well. If I'd been closer, I would've felt more obligated to say goodbye, but really, I was only at the "Hey, how's it going?" level with anyone, and it didn't feel worth the awkwardness.

I'll let you in on a secret, one that I don't mind sharing now that I'm not there anymore. When the agency gave me the assignment, they told me it was for a machine operating position. Then they called me back and said that they actually wanted me on general labour. I got there, and while talking to the other people who were starting the same day, found out that the general labour position was only two weeks, while machine operating was ongoing. When they asked me what position I was there for, I said machine operating, and they just put me to work.

It was kind of funny... That place was primarily a training centre, so they had people training there to get jobs like the one I was working at the same location, but without any training.

My trainee got fired, by the way. He didn't show up for mandatory overtime, thought he had an extra day off for a holiday because that's how schools do it, showed up late for his second day, and went home early on his second day, because he was feeling sick.

Until recently, I was the biggest guy I knew. When I was a teenager, I resented it. I felt it made me seem imposing and intimidating, but it was a trait that was always strongly attributed to me. Once I got over my insecurity, I began to enjoy having this unique trait... But now, it seems like everywhere I go, there's someone bigger than me!

At my last workplace, there was someone bigger than me... At the CWY meet, there was someone bigger than me... At Karate, there's someone bigger than me... At my new workplace, there's two people bigger than me.

Seriously, the only person I can think of that I knew who was bigger than me, in the entirety of my lifespan, before starting work at my previous placement about two months ago, was my high school grade 12 English teacher. That's it.

But it's okay, right? Just stay away from those guys, and surround yourself with midgets, right?

Well, the first guy introduced himself to me individually, and we wound up sitting next to each other in the breakroom. Second guy was the first person I met, us having both showed up before everyone else at the meeting, at the same time, and both being from Guelph... And me helping him find the bus station afterwards. The Karate guy is a blackbelt who gives me a ride home, he's the first person I ever sparred with, and he gave me free sparring gear... And then, one of the guys at the new workplace, I started with him the same day, did orientation with him, and then sat with him until he got... fired. The other guy... Heh... I beat in an arm wrestle. Well... We agreed to be equals, but he's the one who appealed... I'm new, so I don't want to hurt a senior worker's pride, so I accepted. But really, you don't make that appeal unless you're scared.

ANYWAY, as you can see, I forged close relationships with each one of these people. I think this is fate's way of, first, getting me to accept myself, and then, making sure I don't start thinking this quality is the entirety of my being.

You know how I remember how to get home from downtown? My home is on Grange street. Grange turns into Grove, and Grove turns into Rose. So I remember by thinking that... Grange sounds like range, and a grove is on a range, and a rose is on a grove. When I told Mom that, she quoted that Dr. Seuss, Fox in Socks book... You know, about...

"Look, sir. Look, sir.
Mr Knox, sir.
Let's do tricks with
bricks and blocks, sir."

Maybe not that exact quote, but it's true, with memory tricks like I use, it's no wonder I'm always getting lost...

A Little More Info

So, I've got a few more specifics on my CWY exchange. I have the name of the town I'll be in for my French rotation: La Pocatiere, Quebec. I looked it up, but their doesn't seem to be a ton of interesting info surrounding it. It looks kind of small, but that makes sense too, because, while they still have nothing placed under "Theme" for my exchange, at the bottom of the page, there's a "Mandate" category, with this description:

"Ministère de l'Agriculture
Direction Nationale de l'Agriculture

Le Ministère de l’Agriculture est l’institution chargée d’exécuter les objectifs de développement Rural en fonction de la politique définie par le gouvernement. La structure d’exécution chargée de la mise en œuvre du Programme d’échange est la Direction Nationale de l’Agriculture (DNA)."

I put that through Google Translate and got:

"Department of Agriculture
National Department of Agriculture

The Ministry of Agriculture is the institution responsible for implementing the rural development objectives based on the policy defined by the government. The structure shall be responsible for the implementation of the Exchange Program is the National Department of Agriculture (DNA)."

What I get from that is that the Department of Agriculture will be creating the structure for my exchange. That means my Theme is probably Agriculture. Remember, there was Health, Environment, and Agriculture.

So, why would it make sense they'd send me to a smaller town? Because Agriculture themed exchanges have you working on farms. There were a number of people who wanted me to avoid that...

It's funny, because in Katimavik, I got cheated out of my French segment, and out of my farming segment. Now I'm going to two different places that have French as a second language, and I'm going to have farming as my work placement!

Now, in Mali, the most suitable locations for agriculture appear to follow the Niger river. So we can make a rough estimate that that's the general idea of where I'll be going.

Working Good Friday

They asked me back for Good Friday, which means I'm going to be paid double time. That's a little bit surprising, since they didn't ask us back for the two weekend days following. I'd think that, if they wanted one day of labour, they wouldn't make it the day that costs them twice as much. But I'm not going to tell them otherwise!

Hey, I got to train someone today! It was play cool. It was the guy's first job in a factory, and I think I did a pretty good job. All four machines were running at once, and by the end of the day, he was keeping pace. At first, I showed him how to do everything, and there was a buildup, which is natural. My supervisor told me to put his training on hold, and to just keep all the machines going. So I catch up, explain stuff to him as he goes... When there's no buildup, I let him try a part. The parts build up a little... I catch him up, let him do it again. About two thirds of the day through, he's doing most of it on his own, but when the parts exceed what he can do in the next load, I take over and catch him up. By the end of the day, he's doing it on his own.

I impressed myself, just with my performance, too. The supervisor told me to hold pace with the machines, and that I didn't have time to train. But not only did I keep pace, I finished the buildup from the training segment, then I finished the buildup that the last shift left me... Probably from another training segment, and then I trained the new guy well enough that he was keeping pace with all four machines by the end of the shift.

They said they're going to put me on the "big machine" now. Supervisor told me it was a promotion and that I'm going up in the world.

I... got a girl's phone number today. It was really pathetic, though. She basically had to ask me to ask her for it. Now, what the hell do I do with it? I hate myself.

CWY has provided me the names of the people in my group, but it looks like they've only told me the Canadians. There are six names so far. I've been watching this list grow. I was the first person to be selected for this group. I don't remember how big a CWY group is, but I remember it was bigger than a Katimavik one, but not twice as big... So, between 12 and 21. Half are Canadian, so this might be the extent of the Canadian side of things. There are four Ontarians and two people from BC. This is exactly how it was in Katimavik. They put such an emphasis on placing people based on geography, so that each group would be diverse, and implied that people of a visible minority would be given precedence in the selection, but final result was almost all Ontarians and BC people, with a few Quebecois, almost no one from anywhere else, and almost no one of a visible minority.

Bored...

So, there was this cartoon when I was a kid called Whatamess. At the time, I thought, "See, this is the kind of show I'll enjoy right now, but ten years from now, there's no way I'm going to remember it." Well, recently, I remembered it by remembering I wouldn't remember it. Here's the theme song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGeJ6jDPE2U

I'm on Night Shift as of this week. I'll be on Nights for two weeks and rotate to Afternoons. Then two weeks of that, and then move to Days, etc.

I've got a consistent station now. I do air gauging for housings. I'm not sure what they house, though. On the signout card, the part name is just called "Case".

I don't really leave my day with any good stories. I'm competent at my job, my coworkers are nice, the machines generally run smoothly, I get along with my supervisors... It's all very pleasant, but it lacks... dynamism.

I guess I'll explain what I do in more detail, then...

I have these seven rods. Each one has air coming out of it. I have these cases. The cases have holes and grooves in them, each one fitted for a certain rod. I put in the appropriate rod, and twist so it gauges the entire area. I have a computer which shows a meter. A coloured bar slides up and down the meter. If the bar is green, it's good. If it's yellow, it's still good. If it's red, I have to report to someone. I take cases from four machines.

Sometimes there's an air leak, so I have to replace a tube. Sometimes there's a buildup of grime, so I have to clean. Sometimes, the gauge handle comes loose and I have to tighten it.

And I do that all day for eight hours.

At the other places, my days were so dynamic, I couldn't even post about them! Even when I was just putting springs all day, I got to spring race people, fight to the top, feel the despair of being bested... I'd hope for sit down parts, fear stand up parts, think about how the day was broken down... At least the days were different.

Oh well, my life is gonna pick up soon enough. I might as well just clock in and clock out until my departure.

The Deadly Yellow Fever

I wish CWY told me what cities I was going to. I may not know about the geographic division system in Mali, but I certainly know that Quebec has cities. Actually, whatever community I'm going to in Mali, it probably won't be the size of a city. I read somewhere that they like to send participants to small communities.

I looked up Yellow Fever, which, if you remember, is the only required vaccination. Apparently, this is the definition for Mali's most troubling disease:

"Asian fetish is a slang term which usually refers to an interest, attraction or preference for people, culture, or things of Asian origin by those of non-Asian descent.[1][2][3][4] The term Asiaphile is sometimes used to describe the same phenomenon as is yellow fever.[5][6]"

Funny, I would've thought I'd need this vaccination if I were going to Asia...

Nah, it actually is a disease transmitted through mosquito bites which causes fever, nausea and pain, and usually subsides in a few days. There's a small chance of a toxic phase which can cause liver damage and jaundice. Well, at least I think that's the definition they were talking about. I got both those definitions...

I have told surprisingly few people about CWY. I've written about it on this blog (two consistent readers) and I've posted on my Twitter (two consistent readers) but I haven't pulled out the big guns... FB and email. I've told my family, a family friend, and an old coworker. That's it. I don't know why. I feel like I've already had my taste of adventure, that I'm selfish to ask for more, that I'm ditching everyone, and that I'll be asking for more now that the romance of me striking out on my own has passed. But I've got to make the announcement.

I have the worst signature. It's a sloppy, awkward mess of swirls and jags. I developed my signature in elementary school in an art class. My teacher thought it was superb. I used it for awhile and it stuck, and I don't feel like I can really change it at this point. Oh well, at least it'd be really hard to forge!

Remember when I said that I seemed underqualified to be holding these machine operating positions? Well, recently, somebody asked me what I did. I told him, and it turned out he was an engineer. He continued to question me on the specifics, and I had an answer for everything. Eventually, he asked me where I received my education. He seemed confused when I said "Nowhere!"

There are machine operating courses, BTW. You can get degrees in it. It explains why people are so much more into there work here than the people on assembly were. Sometimes you only appreciate something if you have to work to get it.

I find that, a lot of time, guys can get a little TOO into their work around these machines, though. I remember the first time, way back at my first plant, coming back from Katimavik, when I was put on unloading, inspection, and gauging at a machine, I was pushing the gauge into the parts too hard, and it was causing the parts to get damaged. My trainer came over to me, and told me that the parts were like a woman, and that I was hurting her.

Pretty effective training technique. The rest of the day, I felt like people were watching me and criticizing my lovemaking techniques. I also felt like a huge jerk for having damaged the parts, so I was extra-careful from thereon in.

I thought that was a creative way to motivate someone to pay attention to their job, but when I went back to the machine, a guy swung by just to relate with me on the joys of gauging those parts. He said "Nice and tight, right? Like VAGINA!"

Well, it's a factory, so everything's going to be related to sex. And besides, maybe it's just this station, right? Well, at both these last machine shops, it's been the same way. Guys always throwing down double entendres about their machines. Every trainer relates them to women, and it's not done just as a training device. Not only that, but you should see how protective these guys get of their machines, and how much effort they put into treating them right. If a supervisor tells them to pass parts that the worker doesn't feel are optimal, they'll freak out, even though they're not being paid by the part, and their job isn't at risk. I've seen many times guys stand up for the honour of their machine. Guys, go home and spend that much time on your wives.

I don't get it, honestly. If anything, I resent the machines a little. If a supervisor told me to sledge hammer one of them, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

But recently, I got the "like a woman" spiel FROM a woman! Aw, crap. Now even more of my pride is on the line...

I got to do my first bit of sparring in Karate a couple days ago. It was against a blackbelt, so obviously I was slaughtered. He kept analyzing my attack pattern, figuring out my favourite kick, and my favourite combo... I didn't know I had favourites. I was using the roundhouse more than other moves because he was weaving back and forth and I wanted to cover as much area as I could, just to increase my chance of landing any hit at all. And I kept using a light blow to create an opening followed by a more decisive one because that's all I know, basically. If I blocked, I could take two shots from him but get hit on the third, because you block with your arms, but you attack with two arms and a leg. Two blocks vs three blows. You come out losing. I tried dodging, but I kept getting backed in a corner. I tried charging, and I kept getting countered! Oh well, that's how you start. Especially fighting a blackbelt. I got two blows in, in the entire session, but one turned out to be an illegal move, and on the other one, I hit too hard. I only hit that hard because at that point, I didn't actually believe I'd ever land a hit.

But it was good. The guy gave me some sparring gear for free.

Some CWY Ponderings

Okay, so Mali is one of the 25 poorest countries in the world. The Sahara Desert runs through it, and the climate ranges from "desert" to "semi-desert". It's 90% Muslim. The official language is French. The food there usually consists of rice, millet, sauces made from leaves, and sometimes strips of meat.

I have to get a Yellow Virus vaccination, but they also recommend Tetanus and diphtheria, Poliomyelitis, Measles, Hepatitis B, Hepatitis A, Typhoid, and Meningococcal meningitis. I think I have Tetanus and diphtheria.

Other than that, and the fact I need 4 passport photos, there doesn't seem to be any more costs.

The woman who works at the station next to me is from West Africa. At my first Linamar branch, I worked with someone from South Africa. When I was in Katimavik, two people from a region of Africa that I can't remember did a speech for us at our rotation camp, moving from Thunder Bay to Chisasibi. They spoke to us about their culture, and what it was like adapting to ours.

I know you can't take an entire continent, and say that knowing this one culture was this way, means that you know what you're going into, but it's all I got, sooo...

These guys... They said that cows were huge culturally. Everyone owns cows, and they all roam freely. They have markings so people know whose cows are whose, but nobody owns land. They were all named after cows. Like, the one guy's name meant "brown horned cow" and the other guy's meant "cow with brown back". They said they danced for their cows. And not like "I'm dancing, give me a cow" but rather, "Hello cow, would you like to watch me dance?". And dancing was huge for them, too.

Also... A guy who travelled Africa, who did a speech at my high school said that, even if they have poor resources, their quality of life is far higher. He said that everyone is always happy. They'd tell him that us Canadians, with our food, water, and money, must always be so happy. But it wasn't true.

I leave for Mali the day after my birthday. Meaning, my last day in Quebec is going to be my B-day.

I remember one of the people at the meeting said almost all they ever ate while they were travelling abroad was beans and rice. I know that beans and rice are staples over much of the world. I didn't see anything about beans, but it looks like I may be in for a similar experience.

I am really scared right now, okay? I'm more scared for this than I was for Katimavik, and even if I want to do it, I feel I have more regrets about leaving this time than I did for Katimavik.

Before Katimavik, I couldn't find work, and while I had some pretty cool experiences during my stint of unemployment, that's not the kind of life you want to maintain. As I leave this time, I've got a job and, if not a clear idea of where I want to go, a clearer one at any rate.

Buuuut, I know I wanted to do this when I had a clearer head than the one I have now, and the call for adventure is overwhelming. My current goal is to stay so busy that I don't have time to be scared. So far I've been doing a pretty good job of that. Cover your fear and stress with lesser, more immediate fears and stresses.

Accepted Into CWY

Oh wow... Oh wow... Oh... oh. I uh... just received my confirmation email for CWY... Leaving June 28, first station in Quebec, second station in Mali. They didn't say what the program focus was.

Bunch of Stuff

I ran into a coworker from my last workplace the other day. I told her that I had been fired, but had been hired inside 15 minutes at the big plant for the same company, doing the exact same job. Know what she said? She said that I hadn't been fired... I'd been transferred. She said they sometimes do this when they need someone with a certain skillset at another branch... Instead of training someone new, they send over someone who already has the capabilities.

I don't know if this is true or not, but I guess it does make certain sense. I still don't like that guy I blamed for my last firing, though.

I don't really want to throw down all my theories about the underground mechanisms of Guelph's savior company from the recession... Since it's all conjecture, I feel I have a right to speak openly, but still... It's not like I think this company has shown me any kindness or loyalty, but if I didn't feel that my life had improved because of it, I would have quit. So I don't see the sense in ragging on them too badly, because they've done me overall good, and also, for the off chance that someone influential might read my ranting.

I'm wondering about the ethics of putting all my experience with this company under one section on my resume. It'll be difficult putting the last two branches side-by-side, because I had the same tasks for both of them, and putting so many short-term jobs in a row doesn't look as good as having one longer, consistent placement.

I've been toggling between $1500 and $2000 in my savings lately... I made it up to $1500 fairly quickly, but I can't seem to get much headway since. I took a look at my earnings... and if I take the net pay of a month as being four weeks of 40 hours of work... And subtract what I spend on rent, phone, Karate, bus, and cab fare... I STILL have more than half what I make! So I don't get it... I don't spend much on myself, and I usually do more than 40 hours anyway... But I think it's all the little things... Transfer shifts and you lose a shift... I transferred three times inside two weeks, so that's 24 hours lost... I had those two weeks unemployment... I had that surprise CWY meet, where I had to spend on Greyhound, and that $9 BURGER!!! I got my haircut... Etc.

I couldn't get my timesheet signed for last week... I couldn't find my supervisor. I found two others, but while the sheet says any supervisor can sign for it... Well, one of them said they hadn't been there all week, so they couldn't verify the times, and the other said that I needed my direct supervisor to sign for it.

This'll be fun to explain to the agency... It's not the first time it's happened. At my last place, sometimes supervisors wouldn't show up for overtime... Happened to me twice. Agency tends to blame you for it, "We'll do our best, but don't let it happen again!"

It's been over two weeks now since the CWY meet, and I haven't been contacted. I think this means that I haven't been set for the default groups headed out in June. It was probably a mistake to put myself as "Open". They try to put everyone where they prefer, so what do you do with your wild card? You hold it in reserve.

June had the second-highest number of groups heading out at once. I figure they might call on me at the last minute as a replacement for someone who got cold feet at the last second, which tends to happen... or I'll be placed in a group for the last month leaving this year... September. If that happens, I'm a little irked, because that college course starts in September, and I don't know how I feel about giving CWY, a shorter, less credited program, priority.

I'd like to say that CWY's participants were a lot more multicultural. There were a lot of second-generation Canadians who were joining because they wanted to visit the homeland of their parents. In the Katimavik application, one of the questions was whether or not you were a part of a visible minority. But when you got inside the program... There were only three people in a visible minority, in all the five groups we'd seen. Strangely, they were all also in the same group, and two of them dropped out.

I won a free coffee the other day. I also forgot my bus pass. Bus fare was more expensive than the coffee, so I lost money overall, but I was so freaking blitzed over the coffee, you don't even know. It's a matter of pride: I won, Time Hortons lost. So there. Pro tip: When you when a free coffee at Tim Hortons, you get the X-large Cafe Mocha. That's the most expensive thing you can get with it. I don't care if you feel like a dandy, or you don't like Cafe Mocha... It's a matter of principle.

Besides, I only had to pay half the bus fare... On my way to work, the bus driver recognized me, and when I tried to put in my change, he told me not to worry about it and let me on for free! That was almost worth the $2.75 overall bus fare I paid that day.

You know what the part name is for the machine I work with now? Driven. Isn't that stupid? I thought driven was a verb, not a noun. I feel like a fool saying "Yeah, I make drivens."

Plus, we have a platform next to us with the unfinished drivens, and it has a big sign saying "Driven Raw". That sounds less like a factory station, and more like a porno.

I think I'm doing all right here. They had me running my own machine the other day. When one supervisor asked me to bring down a couple of parts to gauge, he moaned and said "I came." When another supervisor came by and asked me how many parts I'd made, she clapped me on the back and told me I was beautiful. So I... think these are good signs.

First Day at the Big Plant

The new job is in a factory right next to my old one, and it's almost exactly the same task. Just like when I transferred from one machine to the next last time, this one has the same premise, but different specifics. So I'm going back into training.

There's a Tim Hortons right nearby. I think they position themselves so that all factories have one immediately available. Remember how I complained that these places offered nothing special, and that the patriotism surrounding them was foolish? Well, I've grown to consider the quality of a job dependant on it's proximity to a Timmies. I don't know what it is about them.

Yo, if you're ordering a sandwich there, get the chicken salad. It's the best bang for your buck.

Anyway, I'm meeting another coworker there before work tomorrow. It's how we did things at my first factory. I'm thinking that, if it's the closest coffee shop to my old location as well, I might be able to run into some old friends from my last workplace.

This new place is so pretty, yo. It's got all this curvy glass, and at the front, they have this huge rock garden/manmade pond ensemble. I wasn't sure if it was really okay for the likes of me to just walk through the entrance, it was so attractive.

But I was, and when they gave me my PPE... Well, the earplugs were so swag. I had another pair, which I got from a guy at my first factory after coming back... I don't remember if I told you guys, but he went to the same high school as me, and we saw each other every day, but because we both looked completely different at that time, neither of us recognized each other at first.

Anyway, he gave me some real nice earplugs... Washable, and a better fit for the ear. He gave all the temps earplugs like this. But after he left, I lost my pair.

Every branch seems to have different PPE designs. At my first branch, we had these foam earplugs, connected with a string. At my second, they wouldn't shell out for a string.

But these new earplugs are better than even the gift of my old friend. They have every advantage of my old pair, but the string is made of a better material, and the plugs are directly attached to the string.

New machine is better than the last ones, too. If something goes wrong, it actually tells you, in plain English on the screen. No more judging based on how exploded a part is. Also, if you try and run it despite the flashing command on screen, it won't let you. And not only will it tell you what problem you have... It also tells you how to fix it.

No more judging based on a number on a gauge, followed by analyzing a blinking light pattern, followed by a memorized code based on the light pattern. If something screws up, this machine will tell you what happened, how to fix it, and it won't let you make a mistake.

So far, these machine operating jobs have been becoming easier by the task.

Working Tomorrow

Well, whatever story surfaced about me, it has been set. I tried to sleep through the shift, but didn't quite make it. I don't so much mind being fired as I do that my former coworkers might hear lies about me. I shared my side of the story to only one other person...

Honestly, the only reason I'd want to swing by and return my stuff is so I could see my old friends and try to clear my name... But y'know... If they knew me well enough that I should care about our relationship, they won't buy into false stories like that, and if they didn't know me that well... It shouldn't really matter, because they didn't really know me. Well, that's how I should feel, but it's hard to convince myself.

I just updated my resume, and it kind of irritates me to look at it. I have five factory positions, and I'm about to get another one. To keep it all on one page, I took off my general labour and light landscaping stuff I was just doing for random people. I'm sure I did more of that than the first two factory jobs I did, pretty near to when I finished high school, but on a resume, if you can put an official company name, I think that looks more impressive than saying you did chores for a bunch of friends. Now my resume doesn't have anything on it that isn't connected to an official organization or program.

My new job starts tomorrow at 8 AM. If nothing else, look at how employable I am now, eh? And the pain of tedium and slow deterioration as you burn away your life in return for money is less than the pain of shame, poverty, and guilt that came with unemployment.

My new job is at the main Linamar location. Maybe all this was like a promotion, hey?

After CWY, or if I don't do it, I'll probably go to college. If I don't think of anything else, I'll do that course for becoming a support worker. I did some research, and there's a one-year course that costs under $3000, that's in the city, and I know someone who's gotten a job through it. And if there's any time beforehand, maybe I'll go work for the wolfman in Chisasibi for a month. If it's not a perfect plan, it's gotta be better than staring like a deer in the headlights.

Lost Another Job

This one feels personal. This factory is known for hiring anybody. Everyone said I was a shoe in. I was the only guy that got fired, and five weeks is past the introductory stage, but before they'd have to make a decision based on whether or not they wanted to give me benefits, so it's a weird time to go. I asked the agency what the reason was, and they said the company only said they "didn't feel I was a good fit".

I think I know why it happened. My coworker and trainer for the new machine... Urg.. I'm not going to name names, but I'm going to strain my privacy policy just for this man. It's still hard to talk about, but it's also hard not to, if that makes sense.

Well, this guy was a middle-aged man and a master of the puppy dog face. He had no ambition in life other than to please authority. People weren't generally aware of his existence. When I first met him, I believed he was the sweetest, purest, most innocent man I'd ever met in my life. He spoke very little English and I don't think he was interested in training anyone. He never taught me how to put any of the inserts, or how to do the OPC, or how to fill my QB card. The first day I worked with him, I did one incredibly easy job. The next, I did a different one. On the third day, I did both jobs at once, and also, two more that were more difficult and which he never taught me how to do. It's a good thing I already knew them from the other station, but he didn't know that.

If I asked him a question, instead of answering me, he'd more likely do the job for me. And not just do that job, but every job until we were through with that part. And he never repeated himself. Whenever he asked me to do anything, he would say "Will you please" first. Probably buy me coffee, too.

All this makes you think that he was just shy. Probably self-conscious about his English, and not wanting to be the one to tell me to do anything I didn't want to do. I'm not going to harsh on him too badly for being an ineffective teacher. That's sort of a branch skill you don't usually need for a factory job. The only person I'd harsh on for that is a teacher.

But after awhile... you began to saw that his need to be seen as a "good boy" in the eyes of the authority could come off as kind of selfish. For instance, one time he dropped a gauge. It stopped working, and he asked me to go ask the lead hand to fix it. It's not like the lead hand was very far off, or that he was busy and needed to keep working, but rather, he wanted it to look like I did it.

Well, I thought that was kind of a dick move, but since he'd been there longer, it looks worse for him to make a mistake like that, so I covered for him.

One day, he told me we'd leave half an hour early. I thought it was out of character for him, so I asked him twice to confirm that's what he meant. He was closing in on the end of a 12 hour shift. There was a bug going around and I think he'd been feeling under the weather since the beginning. He looked dead on his feet. I didn't want to be the wet blanket that told him no. I got my coat, my backpack, and my QB card. I asked for his help filling out the card, just so that there is truly no misunderstanding based on language, and he'll see exactly what I'm doing. I had put down my time accurately on the card, but I saw he'd put down his full twelve. I do half of the same job as him, so we have to stop working at the same time. If we put down contradicting times, I'm selling him out. I ask him what to put down, and he tells me eight hours (he worked his first four hours with the other guy who does my job).

So I go and put my QB card, and I run into the supervisor. I thought that might happen. If you're going to skip out, don't do it so late in the day. There's no supervisor for Nights... It was the Day Shift supervisor. He goes, "You're leaving already?" I say "Yes" He says "Why?" I say "He told me to".

Supervisor sounds satisfied with that and dismisses me. Wasn't much else for me to say. Soon as I was caught, there was pretty much no way to protect my coworker. I can feel my false QB card itching, but I can't do anything, because it's already been submitted.

Next day, my trainer approaches me:
Him: Why you leave early?
Me: You told me to.
Him: No.
Me: Okay, I believe you didn't mean to. It must have been a miscommunication.
Him: No.
Me: I'm sorry, I mean, we didn't understand each other.
Him: No.
Me: I asked you twice.
Him: No. Supervisor ask me why you leave early. I don't know. I come back and you're gone. I don't know where you go.
Me: I'm sorry, I don't want you to get in trouble for my misunderstanding. Do you want me to talk to the supervisor and tell him it was my mistake?
Him: Don't talk supervisor. I'm not in trouble anymore. You have to work eight hour. You work only seven.
Me: Seven and a half.
Him: No. Why you go home early? I never told you to go home early.
Me: We didn't understand each other. I think you say go home early, but it's not true. I ask you twice if I go home early, but you don't understand me.
Him: No. I never tell you go home early. You never ask me go home early.
Me: Are you calling me a liar?
Him: No.
Me: Do you think I would leave if you told me not to?
Him: No.
Me: So we didn't understand each other.
Him: No.
Me: Are you saying I'm lying?
Him: No.
Me: I ask you twice.
Him: No. You have to work eight hour. You only work seven.
Me: Seven hour, thirty minute.
Him: No. Why you go home early? I never tell you go home early. You never ask me go home early.
Me: You ask same question, you get same answer.

So he kept asking me the same questions, and getting the same answers, until the bell rang for work to start. He spoke to the other guy who does that job, telling the story like it's a joke, and in his version. All throughout the day, he keeps reminding me to work eight hours, and to stay in the factory. And he's real nice about it. He buys me coffee, speaks even more formally when making requests...

Aaaaaand the next day is inventory. And guess what? It's not just the time on my QB card that's wrong, but also the part production, because he worked a twelve hour shift whereas I only worked eight. He told me to put down the same number as him.

Sooo, don't you think it's a little suspect that the one day he gets me to put the wrong number, the next day is inventory, and he knows this but doesn't tell me?

The man wants to be alone. He doesn't want anyone but authority to know of his existence. He wants to be a good boy for the higher ups. He doesn't mind sacrificing subordinates for his reputation.

In the eyes of my supervisor, he had to decide weather it was me or him that was lying. And with that guy's habit of widening his eyes, and staring at you pleadingly, just looking for a bit of understanding... That puppy dog look he'd fix on the lead hand every time he broke something and wanted it understood that it wasn't really his fault... That look he fixed on ME every time he responded "No" in that dialogue up there... Well, to my supervisor, he probably saw me as a guy who cut out early, tried to take credit for more parts than I did, and when I was caught, I threw this sweet, innocent old man under the bus. I'd probably hate me, too.

And now, tonight, there's going to be word on the factory floor, when my previous coworkers look to my station and see it empty. They'll look for an answer, and you just know something's gonna catch, and I don't know what it's gonna be. That... drives... me... CRAZY!

But heeeeey, guess what? I have a pair of their reusable gloves. I have a key for my lock to the robotic arm. Maybe they'll need that back, but I doubt it. They probably have a copy. I've got a stamp, too, to signify which parts I've done. Even if they don't ask for them back, maybe I'll swing by and offer them.

I've got a new job, though. Agency offered it fifteen minutes after they told me I was fired.

Thing about Linamar is, they've single-handedly pulled Guelph out of the recession. They have seven branches and work through an agency. This means that if they lay you off after three months, you won't stop working for them. You'll just get rotated to another branch. In this way, you can work permanently for Linamar as a temp.

CWY Meeting Recap

Well, I managed that CWY thing. On my way there, the Greyhound filled up and they couldn't take everyone in one trip. On my way back, it was the same. Both times I made it on, but not by a very wide margin, so I overheard the bus driver telling the passengers who couldn't make the first one what their situation was. For Guelph-to-Toronto, there was a second bus coming. For Toronto-to-Guelph, there was nothing.

Are they... allowed to do that? And why are the buses so packed, anyway? I've taken the Guelph and Toronto Greyhounds many times before, and I've never seen this before. And I can't explain it away as it being a busy time of the week, because I've used them at those times before, too.

Little scary, because both times, I got in line about 20 minutes early, and both times, I almost missed my bus.

The meeting itself was pretty standard. It was five hours long and didn't really offer any new information. Their conception of "fundraising" is a joke. By their standards, when all those people gave me money and gear for Katimavik, that was me "fundraising". They had a lot of high-end ideas about hosting events and getting funding from big organizations and important people, but come on. The mayor's not going to pay for my trip. Are you serious.

We asked them what they did for fundraising and they all basically answered either, "I asked my family and friends" or "I paid for it myself".

I think they want the program to seem accessible to everyone, so they call it "fundraising", but when it comes down to it, they really mean "It costs $3000". Again, not unreasonable for a program that'll cost them $18000, but I wish they wouldn't so extensively detail a fake label they're only using to make themselves look better. Would've saved me a trip if they just told me to pay $3000.

I know that CWY is an actual, government-sponsored organization devoted to doing good, and probably something worth donating to, the one awkward bit being that donating to it is also directly donating to me. But if it were about that, they wouldn't accept payment out of pocket.

Me and one other guy arrived for the meeting at exactly the same time. We were both from Guelph, we were the first ones there, we were the two tallest people at the meeting, and we hung out afterward and then travelled back on the same Greyhound together. He didn't take the Greyhound to Toronto, but in a way, that just makes the coincidences weirder, since they're harder to play out.

I paid $7 for a burger!!! ARGH!!! I mean, it was a pretty good burger, but come on! I can believe airport food being expensive, since rich people travel by plane, but poor people travel by bus, so I'm surprised bus terminal food is similarly priced. That was the best deal I could find there. My friend paid $9 for a burger.

Seemed like a lot of people at the meeting were younger than me. Doing the program fresh out of high school, which I guess is optimal. There were some people younger than me, though. My counterpart will probably be in the 21-25 demographic since that's what I fit into, and they try to match by age.

They asked me what my prioritizations were, and I told them to put me down as "open". That means, put me anywhere. Why not? With a program like this, you have to be ready for anything. No program is the the same. I guess it's best to take a bit of control when it comes across your way, but honestly, I've got no idea what I want.

I'm almost guaranteed a spot inside the four months from June. Last year, everyone that attended one of those meetings got placed, although not necessarily where they wanted.