Saturday, January 8, 2022

Year Forward and Back Tarot Reading 2021-2022

Last year I did a year ahead tarot reading. A Celtic Cross spread, exploring 2020 in the Beneath and Behind cards, and looking into 2021 in the Above, Before and Outcome cards.

I used to do one with a central card representing the theme of the entire year, surrounded by twelve cards, each representing a month. But it appeared that modern readers were generally distancing themselves from such spreads, not wanting to be confused with fortune tellers. People tend to fixate on the predictive quality of tarot, but most spreads look as much into the past and present, and usually don't treat the future as if it's static, offering two futures with an optional intervention that chooses between them.

This year, I did another Celtic Cross, a 10-card spread which I would say is the most standard. I did one for Lee-Anne and she did one for me, but I'll only be describing the one she did for me in this post. 

Before we get into the newest reading, let's look at last years and see if it had any accuracy.

Last year, I got The Emperor in Reverse for my Above card, representing my uninterrupted future, and I got the Queen of Pentacles as my Advice, which, should I have chosen to take it, would lead to the Outcome, which was Death.

I interpreted the Emperor in Reverse to contrast my Cover card, which represented who I was at that time, which was The Hierophant. Both are Major Arcana and connected to one another. The Hierophant represents a leader in the realm of the spiritual, philosophical and intangible, whereas the Emperor is a leader more focused on practical, real-world approaches. The Hierophant was upright while The Emperor was reversed, so the former was drawing from the positives of such a style while the latter the negatives. I interpreted this to mean I was in danger of my leadership style changing from one that was observant and attending to mental health needs, to one that was more authoritarian and externally-focused.

The option given to me to avoid such an outcome was the Queen of Wands, which would lead to Death. This seems grim, but Death in tarot rarely represents physical death (that would more likely be The World, Judgement, or the 10th card of any suit, although there aren't any cards that can only mean physical death) and more often the end of something followed by rebirth. This is probably the most-repeated lecture any reader has to give, since there's a lot of fear surrounding the Death card for those that aren't familiar with the meanings. It's a mid-stage card, not and ending one, it's usually positive, and probably preferable to The Emperor in Reverse.

At the time, I interpreted the Queen of Wands to be Lee-Anne, and Death a form of spiritual rebirth. So the takeaway was to abide by Lee-Anne's influence instead of just trying to handle things myself. 

My Crossing (The Fool), Near Future (Page of Wands Reversed), and Recent Past (Page of Swords Reversed) cards all represented new beginnings and unpredictable futures filled with apprehension. My interpretation was that this unpredictable future event would be the thing that threatened to lead me toward career burnout.

 Looking back on the year, I would say that the unpredictable event leading to a potentially negative change in leadership style was my promotion. It came with new responsibilities, including a lot of clerical duties which don't necessarily feed into my strengths. I've had to learn to focus less on the interpersonal qualities of my position and more on the practical, systems-based side of things. Adding to the unpredictability, the person that was supposed to be mentoring me as I took on my new role wound up going on an emergency leave, and then I had to train the person who was taking my old position while I was figuring out my new one. I was then transferred to a new team not long after.

I hate to admit it, but I may have followed the negative route a bit. I think that learning to deal with the new responsibilities has not improved my leadership style, and the stress has weighed on me.

I would say that I did let the Queen of Wands impact me somewhat. In my Year in Review post, I credited Lee-Anne keeping me on track with my weight loss. I feel more in control of than than I have over that since working at the group home. I don't know if that counts as "spiritual rebirth". I don't think it's limited to just weight either, although that's the most observable, measurable change.

Anyway, let's get into the current year. One thing I'd like to note, is that between the two readings, despite using entirely different decks and with different people shuffling, half of the cards were repeats (King of Swords, Queen of Swords, Two of Pentacles, Three of Pentacles, and Ace of Cups). Just interesting to observe, I guess we're walking such similar paths now that it comes across in the reading.



This Covers Me: The Sun

This card represents who I am in my present life. I got The Sun which is one of the most positive cards in the deck. If someone were to ask me which card was the happiest, I'd say it's either the Ten of Cups or The Sun. It represents your goals and the things you want being right in front of you, fully attainable.

This makes sense. Right now I'm with the person I want to be with, doing the job I want to do, I'm living in the place I want to be, and I've got two great cats. I'm walking on sunshine.

This Crosses Me: The King of Swords

This card represents the presenting situation. Swords represent the element of air, burdens, and strengths. The King of Swords is one of the Court Cards, which usually represent people. Kings are symbols of authority, established in their role, well-known and depended upon. This is interesting, because in Lee-Anne's reading, she received this as her Cover card. So this likely indicates that she is the presenting situation.

This is Beneath Me: The Three of Pentacles

This is the recent past. Pentacles represent the element of earth, finances, and tangible things. The Three of Pentacles depicts an architect consulting two people who are going over blueprints for some kind of building. It represents collaboration and communication. Lee-Anne got this for her fear card. I guess it makes sense that she would fear it, if we just went through it not long ago, and perhaps she didn't care for it.

This is Behind Me: The Five of Wands

This is my distant past. Wands represents the element of fire, spirituality, wellness, and day-to-day events. This card depicts five people, fumbling around and trying to work together by connecting the wands that they're holding, with great difficulty.

This card is often seen as negative, with a focus on difficulty with communication, but I've always seen it as more positive than not. I mentioned this in a post and even consulted my grandma about it. While they are having difficulty working together toward a common goal, it's still five people coming together with a shared purpose and attempting to make things work. And I think that's more good than bad.

It flows really nicely with the Three of Pentacles. They're different suits, but the Five of Wands is the card representing difficulty with communication and collaboration, and the Three of Pentacles represents effective communication and collaboration. With the Five of Wands representing the distant past and the Three of Pentacles the recent past, it shows an increase in effectiveness with collaboration over the past year. Nice.

This is Above Me: The Ace of Cups

This is my distant future if I continue the way I am. Cups represent the element of water and emotions. The ace cards represent the beginning of journeys, so it makes sense to conclude that this card is the beginning of an emotional journey. Lee-Anne got this one as her Outcome card. As a side note, all four suits have been shown at this point. Also, the Major Arcana, Court Cards, and Pip Cards have all been represented. Very diverse spread.

This is Before Me: The Ten of Swords Reversed

This is my near future. The ten of swords depicts someone laying on the ground with ten swords in his back. It represents a bad end to a journey filled with burdens. In reverse though, it happens more intentionally. So instead of having this bad fate thrust upon the person, it's more like the person is "ripping off a bandaid". Putting an end to a problem that's been going on for too long.

These Are My Fears: The Queen of Swords Reversed

Queen cards represent a more subtle authority. The power-behind-the power. They provide a guiding influence. The Queen of swords is the type to manage the burdens of others without drawing attention to herself.

Lee-Anne got this in the upright position for her People in Her Life. Since she got the King of Swords as her cover card, it looked like two people in similar life stations, dealing with similar struggles.

This does suggest that Lee-Anne is represented as The King, and myself as The Queen.  I should mention here that the King does not necessarily represent someone who is male, and the Queen doesn't have to be female. With my career using a servant leadership model, dealing with emotions, and using preventative strategies, it's inevitable that I will sometimes be the subtle, guiding influence instead of the authoritative, commanding one. Get over it.

Anyway, the fact that it was upright in Lee-Anne's spread and reversed in mine, and it's her People but my Fear, indicates that I have some doubt in my ability to fulfill my role adequately. Very normal insecurity type stuff.

This is the People in My Life: The Ace of Swords Reversed

I've already said that swords represent burdens and strengths, and aces represents the beginning of journeys, so it makes sense that the Ace of Swords is the beginning of a journey filled with burdens. Being in reverse means that this anticipated journey is full of apprehension. This means that someone in my life is anticipating some kind of commitment, and are uncertain that they can handle the stress that comes along with it. Honestly, nobody is jumping to mind.

This is My Advice: The Two of Pentacles

The Advice card can either be a suggestion or a warning. Basically, it means, "If you do this, whatever the Outcome card is will happen". Basically, if you like the Outcome better than the Above card, follow the guidance of the Advice card. If you like the Above card better than the Outcome, avoid following the Advice. This is the intervention that will allow you to change your future, should you wish.

The number two cards usually have a sense of balance, a kind of yin-yang, a sense of duality. The Two of Pentacles depicts a man juggling two large pentacles with an infinity symbol woven around them. This represents a need to keep track of several different priorities at once, with everything "up in the air".

Lee-Anne got this as her "Crossing" card, her presenting situation.

This is My Outcome: The Page of Pentacles Reversed

The Page is the earliest of the Court Cards. It represents an individual on the early stage of a journey. They have yet to develop a name for themselves and their life is still very dynamic and capable of change. 

This card represents someone trying to take on a new project, but insecure about how to go about it and dealing with setbacks.

Conclusion

I am presently in a very positive life space. Over the past year, I've struggled a lot with communication and collaboration, but with much effort, I have managed to be more productive and capable of handling a nevertheless daunting task. I think this could have to do with my promotion and all the chaos that came along with it, due to role changes, new hires, new responsibilities, changing teams, and unexpected absences, along with shifting between in-person and remote work several times.

Me and Lee-Anne are both becoming more established, and are both experiencing similar growing burdens and responsibilities, becoming more authoritative and developing reputations for ourselves. While we are similar in this regard, there is a subtle difference in how we present, with myself being a more guiding influence and Lee-Anne being more overt. While Lee-Anne sees me as filling my role adequately, I struggle with self-doubt.

In the near future, I will make the hard decision to call an end to something that I've been struggling with for a long time. I don't look forward to making the call, but it's for the greater good. I think this has to do with a facet of my career that I've been trying to put an end to. Don't really think I should go into it here.

Someone in my life is struggling with self-doubt as they look toward a commitment, wondering if they can handle the associated stress. Honestly, maybe it's Lee-Anne and the prospects of marriage are scarier than she's letting on.

In my future I have the choice between a new emotional journey, or to struggle with getting a project off the ground. I probably want the emotional journey, which means that I should avoid juggling priorities. I take this to mean that I should stay focused and not take on too many new responsibilities, and not to confuse myself with too many new ideas. By keeping my head clear, I'll be able to see a new path before me.

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